Wifey Material : The Back-Handed Compliment


| January 31, 2013 - 6:36 pm

I believe our words have power. And when I mean power, I mean literally POWER…. I call it a manifestation of our ability to will our inner most dreams and desires into reality through our words.
Now I know most of you are probably thinking I watch way too many Harry Potter movies, but for us to pretend our words do not possess the potential to be both a gift and a curse is an exercise in irresponsibility. Here are a few examples of what I mean.

Quick question… What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the phrase “I need a man that’s gonna hold me down”?
Some of you are probably thinking it means having a man in your corner that will be there for you when you need him,right? Sounds like an ideal situation…but let’s explore this term further.
Call me crazy, but the very concept of someone holding me down would have me fighting tooth and nail to get their ass off of me. When I think of someone holding you down, they are in essence preventing you from reaching your potential so why on GOD’s green earth would you want to be with someone like that? Trust me when I say if given the opportunity to “hold you down” some men will not hesitate to do so.
You may find yourself in a suffocating, and controlling predicament you weren’t prepared for.

Another phrase that I know we all can do without is “Wifey Material”. Now you may have thought you’ve just been paid the most ultimate of compliments but sadly, you’ve just been duped. What that man’s really saying is although you have qualities or “materials” he really likes, there aren’t enough of them there to make you his wife….stings a little doesn’t it? Not to worry, because he’s just provided you a glimpse into his mind, and all the reason you’ll ever need to leave this fool alone. Its just not worth your time.

And lastly… I swear if I hear another woman say that her man is her “Better Half” I’m going to jump out of the nearest 1st story window I can find! Are you really suggesting that you need a man in order to make you feel whole? What is that saying about the person you were before you met him?
Listen, whomever you decide to be with will have his own laundry list of issues that will inevitably become YOUR issues and I guarantee you you’ll have to deal with the entirety of those issues, not just half.

Many of you will dismiss what I’m telling you and write it off as being too literal. And you know what?… You’re right! I am very literal about this topic. Many of you are finding yourselves trapped in the same cycle of unhappiness because you’re not being literal enough. A man doesn’t need a lot of catch phrases to tell you he loves you, or if he wants to marry you. I’m just saying…