In Think Like a Man, which hits theaters today, the character Gabrielle Union dates is described as a dreamer.
Basically, he hasn’t progressed past the college stage—futons and all. He doesn’t have a good job, he has goals, but he doesn’t make it happen. Gabrielle said she’s actually dated a few dreamers in real life—also known as losers to some—and confesses she didn’t break the cycle until she met her current beau Dwayne Wade. Off top, there’s nothing completely wrong with being a dreamer, you just need to know know which kind you’re dealing with. There’s the Barack Obama dreamer who had a goal he wanted to accomplish and made it happen and then there’s the “I know what I want to do with my life but don’t put in enough effort to make it happen type of dreamer.” If you haven’t been as lucky as Gaby to snatch the total package yet, there are a few dangers you should be aware of when it comes to sticking it out with the dreamer type.
More often than not, you foot the bill
Nothing’s wrong with going dutch in a relationship or treating your man from time to time but when you always have to pay for the both of you to go out, it can weigh on you and your wallet. Chances are if this man is a dreamer, he may be stuck in a dead-end job with little play or he may even be unemployed waiting for that next big break or to become his own boss. If you see real potential in your man and action (key word) being put into achieving his dreams, then nothing’s wrong with holding him down. Unless he’s a jerk, he’ll return the favor 10-fold when he gets his big break. But if you sense he’s just holding on for the free ride, it’s time to drop him off.
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