Experts say women develop their taste in men at a young age. Did you know you wanted to date someone musically inclined? What kind of values do you look for in a man?
I was always into hip-hop and music, but never cared about dating an entertainer. I look for family values, the way they treat their mother, is a good sign of the way they will treat me.
Do you recommend dating a rapper?
I don’t recommend women to go seeking after a rapper. Make sure you like the person underneath the title. Rappers need love too, they are just men at the end of the day. When they are 60 they wont be rappers anymore. It bothers me when people say “Oh you date a rapper.” No, I date a very intelligent man that has a career and a future. I recommend any woman to find love. It doesn't matter what form. Just make sure he’s single and responsible.
I know you struggle with Fabolous “the rapper.” Why do you think entertainers let their jobs come between their morals?
These guys struggle with image. Its about bottle popping, women and money. Sometimes I feel like I don’t fit into the Fabolous life, but, I’m a major part of his world. I dress him, but I’m not a part of his brand. I can tell the difference. Having a family is not a topic a rapper can rap about. I respect it, but I fall back, play my position as his life partner. I have no choice because he had that career before he met me. I love his music, I support him, but when he walks through the house door, I prefer to be greeted by John, not Fab. I know the man, not the rapper. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a good rapper, but he’s a great man.
What makes women stand by their men through all the pain? Why do we torture ourselves?
Love is so powerful. We put faith in our men. When in a relationship, we have hope that things will be better tomorrow. We base our lives on this hope. I never wanted to change my man. I want him to change for himself. I would never force him to marry me; I want him to want to marry me. I don’t recommend marriage in the twenties. This is what works for me; my relationship is designed for me. Some days are harder than others, but I know what counts and I know the grass may not be greener on the other side.
Emily with her children.
What’s big in Emily B’s world?
I’m working on a reality show with VH1. It’s so outside of my character to do this and people are shocked that I’m doing it. I can’t give to much info, but I’ll just say it’s along side a few other women whose lives are similar to mine. I’m also styling a few artists and getting ready to launch an online consignment store. My biggest job is being a mother. I get the most fulfillment from that.
After the interview, I decided to return the peep through the small crack in the door. Johan was sitting on his daddy’s lap, and Fab was reading to him aloud. What a classic moment. I looked over at Emily, she smiled. I then understood more than ever why she believes in her man. Even through all the pain, the sleepless studio nights and the millions of groupies, she continues to fight for her family. It was clear. You just never know what goes on behind closed doors.
Mashonda’s Last Words…
The element of love is somewhat the same as the element of freedom—both are worth fighting for. I look at Emily, a mother of two fantastic children, and see a strong woman with an amazing story. However, there is a struggle that exists. When in love with a person that practically lives in a false world, there might always be a battle. It is genuinely easy to give love to others, but sadly, sometimes it’s easier to forget how to love oneself. Know your limits, know what you will and won’t accept. I’ve watched Emily come into her own and grow from her experiences. My belief is this: If no one is being hurt by your decisions and you believe it is worth the fight, then fight for what your heart desires, but always know when to graciously wave the white flag.
Follow Mashonda on Twitter @MashondaVIBE