When Rick Ross isn’t sitting around watching videos of his baby mamas rolling around naked on a couch for 50 Cent (or putting the finishing touches on his surprisingly good third release,Deeper Than Rap), he’s out helping people become better human beings. Today the BAWSE visited the Miami Gardens Job Corps to talk to students about becoming successful. VIBE wasn’t in the building, but it didn’t stop us from wondering just what kind of motivational message the BAWSE might deliver. Here we cull through Ross’s Port Of Miami (Def Jam, 2006) and Trilla (Slip N Slide/Def Jam, 2007) looking for lyrics that uplift. Now that’s thug motivation!
The Source Material: “It's My Time”
The BAWSE’s Deep Thought: “Who ever thought that I'd make it rich?/The bottom of a barrel, with a bucket of Cris'/I'm telling you man... Life’s a funny thing/ You ain't a dope boy ’til yo' ass got a gun and chain.”
Lesson Learned: We’ll leave the actual drugs to the Colombians…
The Source Material: “Cross That Line”
The BAWSE’s Deep Thought: “A life sentence is a life sentence/All my homies got ’em, they just like business.”
Lesson Learned: According to Officer Ricky, only punks cry over life sentences, lil’ homie.
The Source Material: “Boss”
The BAWSE’s Deep Thought: “Stunting is boss/Shining is boss/Grand daddy kush, or the purp, yellow diamonds is boss.”
Lesson Learned: Duuuuhhhh…BAWSE ain’t the only boss! You can be a boss, too!
The Source Material: “For Da Low”
The BAWSE’s Deep Thought: “Go on let ya top down/Fuck it, blow a couple grand/Treat her like an animal, make her do a hand-stand.”
Lesson Learned: Fat boys aren’t that flexible. So find a woman into fat boys who is.
The Source Material: “Get Away”
The BAWSE’s Deep Thought: “I'm in heavy dough/I don’t kiss every ho/So when I like a bitch, I enlist Mario.”
Lesson Learned: Mario has fans [insert stunned look].
The Source Material: “Blow”
The BAWSE’s Deep Thought: “I see the vision, for club vision, the preface/I get brain, I bust nuts, in each states/Soon as I see what I'm looking for/I sit up in that seat and cut em' off on them 24's/There it goes, baby girl come talk wit' tha' boss/ I pop a rose bottles, you can kick ya shoes off.”
Lesson Learned: If you ain’t pimping state-to-state, you need to stay in school.
The BAWSE’s Deep Thought, part 2: “Gettin' blessed on a jet is a way to reflect/Hard work pays off, I'm a boss, you can tell/By the bottles in the pail, and the models that we share/I'm in a real estate, in a realer state of mind.”
Lesson Learned: If after graduation you still can’t manage to think like the BAWSE, you’re probably better off just becoming a C.O.
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