Olivia’s Blog: I Don’t Want A Boy, I Want A Man


Vibe / June 1, 2010

My name is Olivia and I’m partnering with Vibe.com for a new blog series. I’m going to write a new blog each week on topics that women want to discuss. Some topics might be serious, some might be silly, who knows. Each week I guess you have to come back to Vibe.com and just find out what we’re talking about next. I guess I have to start off with the latest rumor, pictures, etc. circulating on the web. The who I am dating and not dating issues. 

Every woman has had to deal with someone gossiping about their love life. How many times have I heard “It’s easier to date inside your circle”? I don’t think that rule applies to any woman that I know. Dating in your ‘circle’ only allows for more gossip, more talking and more assumptions. It leaves no room for male friends. It leaves no room for male acquaintances, only men that you are dating.

Personally, I find it so difficult because the media is always in your business. But it’s not just the media, it’s other people, other friends, other business associates, all having an opinion about who I am dating. It gets really annoying some times. It’s very difficult for me to go somewhere, see a guy I know, speak with him and then hear the next day how I am dating him. 

I try to keep it separate but somehow it always gets tangled together. I don’t want my love life to be centerstage; the stage is only for my performance. I like to keep my romantic relationship pretty normal. I am open to any guy that knows how to treat me right, gets along with my family and is capable of being a real MAN when I need him.

It’s hard to find someone who loves you for you in my industry. Sometimes people just love you for the glitz and glamour. Every woman has to deal with it; a man after you for all the wrong reasons and I just think when you add a little fame it makes it worst.

All in all, I am like every other woman, just looking for a good man that I can share and partner with through life. It seems like it wouldn’t be so difficult, but as WOMEN we know how hard it is to find a good MAN. I don’t want a boy, I don’t want a toy, I just want a MAN.

So no, every man I take a picture with is not my ‘boo.’  Every man I am talking with is not my ‘boo.’  Every man I am walking with is not my ‘boo.’  When I find him, please believe you will know, because I will shout it from every mountaintop. Like any woman who found her good man, we like to show him off, we like to brag, we like for the world to know. Until then, I am just searching, some days the search is #FINE, and some days, the search is #TERRIBLE, but I will keep searching.