10 Artists That Would Survive A Zombie Apocalypse (And 5 That Wouldn't!)
Unless you've been living under a rock, you already know that we've got a massive Zombie Apocalypse on our hands! Ok, not exactly, but it sure seems that way.
With the sudden rise in Methylenedioxypyrovalerone's—better known as "Bath Salt"—popularity among drug users, there seems to be a new report every other day of a person either getting their face eaten off, trying to eat a cop, or just acting batshit crazy while high on the drug.
We decided to look into this idea of a potential Zombie Apocalypse more and bring it into the world that we know and love the most: the music industry. If the Big Flesh-Eating Bang actually did go down, who would survive to sing another day? We thought about it, and put together this list of 10 Artists That Would Survive A Zombie Apocalypse—And 5 that most likely wouldn't!
With the sudden rise in Methylenedioxypyrovalerone's—better known as "Bath Salt"—popularity among drug users, there seems to be a new report every other day of a person either getting their face eaten off, trying to eat a cop, or just acting batshit crazy while high on the drug.
We decided to look into this idea of a potential Zombie Apocalypse more and bring it into the world that we know and love the most: the music industry. If the Big Flesh-Eating Bang actually did go down, who would survive to sing another day? We thought about it, and put together this list of 10 Artists That Would Survive A Zombie Apocalypse—And 5 that most likely wouldn't!
See if your favorite survives the VIBE Apocalypse in the following gallery:
Rick Ross: Survivor
To keep it all the way real, there's just too much Rozay to go around! You gotta admit, that's a lot of meat to be devouring. The zombies would be full off his pinky toe alone.
50 Cent: Survivor
Surviving 9 shots at the age of 20, a stomach virus in London, and a recent car accident with a Mack truck proves that 50 would definitely survive all the way into the trilogy.
Taylor Swift: Zombie
We'd take it in good faith that Taylor Swift would actually be "honored" to be bitten by a zombie. She'd be so surprised by the gesture that she most likely wouldn't believe it. [cue "Swift Surprised Face"]
Nicki Minaj: Survivor
The undead would take one look at Minaj and walk right past her. Why? Well, everybody knows she's a mothafuckin' monster! Nick is so damn out there with her style & personality, that that they'd mistake her for one of their own.
Rihanna: Survivor
Rih has been so badass lately, that she might even be the Milla Jovovich of this shit. Paired with her training from Battleship, she could be the heroine that saves the day—then hit Perfections the next night.
Wiz Khalifa: Zombie
Wiz would simply be too high to give a fuck. We bet he wouldn't even feel his heart being ripped out.
Hologram Tupac: Survivor
Tupac Shakur is eternal—which was proven when he got resurrected at this year's Coachella festival in the form of a hologram. He could be the mirage that warns everyone that the zombies are closing in. Besides, it's kinda hard to chew through flesh made of reflected light.
Childish Gambino: Survivor
As the geek of hip-hop, we're pretty certain that Gambino has played his fair share of Resident Evil. Once the apocalypse starts, all that video game training will get put to good use. Plus, he'd be the much needed comedic relief.
Mary J. Blige: Zombie
MJB doesn't survive because the zombies need a jingle—and we all know how good she is at those. Just imagine:
"Crispy fingers, fresh entrails, three toenails, wrapped up in some....intestines!"
Common: Survivor
Common's got the Terminator: Salvation experience, so he knows a thing or two about an apocalypse. His "serious face" would also keep out-of-control survivors in check.
Kid Cudi: Survivor
Cudi has that brooding persona that makes him a shoe-in for the "dark avenger" role in our little apocalypse world. He'd certainly have the style for it, that's for sure.
Justin Bieber: Zombie
Given that 90% of the world are Beliebers, and also given that 90% of the world would be dead if zombies ever took over, it's only common sense that Justin would be the number one target. Guess it doesn't pay off to be the most sought after dude in the world in this situation.
DMX: Survivor
This is probably the one artist that would actually scare the shit out of the zombies, instead of it being the other way around. Something about X tells us that he'd be just fine if the world got overtaken by the undead—especially if the Ruff Ryders are still alive.
Lady GaGa: Survivor
If Nicki Minaj is their "sister," the zombies would consider GaGa their "Mother Monster." She'd have no problem surviving—that is, if she actually wanted to. Now that we think of her meat dress, she might be the one to start the damn zombie apocalypse!
Drake: Zombie
Drake unfortunately would pick up the wrong weapon to defend himself with. Instead of an AK47, he's throw a bottle of Cristal.
