Worst Case Scenario
The Lakers get their third-choice coach, maybe a Stan Van Gundy. Dwight bolts, Kobe is out for a year, the Lakers overplay their hand and amnesty Kobe's huge contract. Kobe gets mad and signs with a new team and destroys the league for three or four more seasons, while Steve Nash tearfully retires and Pau becomes the "other Gasol." Metta World Peace discovers pyromania, the Clippers win the Finals, Steve Blake leads the team in jersey sales. The Lakers drive eight hours up the PCH and become the Sacramento Lakers. No one in LA notices, since Blake Griffin dunks so hard that the San Andreas Fault splits open, making California its own republic. Metta World Peace sets it on fire.