VIBE_Rocsi

Rocsi Diaz's Blog: The Struggle To Be Skinny

I am amazed how self-conscious people are about their bodies and the way they physically look, but what is more surprising to me is that it seems young ladies are younger and younger with their age when it comes to the almost crippling everyday feeling of being unsatisfied with themselves.

On my recent USO tour visit to the Ramstein Air Base in Germany, I met a group of lovely young teen girls who are a part of a group called the SMART Girls group. The topic of the day when I was there was: Media influence on women and how they are portrayed.

These young ladies spoke of the very same insecurities that I spoke about when I was 14 and 15, issues that I still think about to this day. The conversation left me wondering to myself if there was really any one person or thing to blame. I do not remember when I was in high school or junior high ever really looking at people on TV and saying to myself I want to be skinny. 

The days I would go by starving myself for fear of seeing the numbers on the scale go up. I knew something was wrong. I weighed myself everyday.

Shamefully, I still do, just without the freaking out part. I just don't remember why I thought a certain weight was fat or that I was fat. Being someone who has struggled with an eating disorder most of my life I now wonder if I will ever be secure with myself and be fully satisfied with who I am. Or are we as women never satisfied with our appearance?

Does that make it another disorder all together? At what age are we telling our young ladies what is appropriate and what is wrong with them, watch what we eat, your ears are huge, your thighs are huge, you’re too fat, you’re too skinny, too tall, too short... When do we ever just stop? Is the media to blame or is it our own household who make us insecure?

Where do the boundaries of what the media is responsible for and what or own household is responsible for stand? Would the new controversial Erykah Badu video "Window Seat" be seen as liberation and art of the ultimate security in oneself? How do young women see that or what do they get from it?

From the Web

More on Vibe

Getty Images

T.I. To Address Controversial Comments About Daughter On ‘Red Table Talk’

T.I. will be joining Jada Pinkett Smith on Red Table Talk to address the controversial comments that he made about his daughter’s virginity nearly two weeks ago. Pinkett Smith revealed that the Atlanta rapper recently filmed an RTT episode with his wife, Tameka “Tiny”  Harris.

“T.I. coming to the table yes, indeed, the actress and producer told Entertainment Tonight at the AFI Film Fest screening of her new show, Hala. “Of course he’s going to address the controversy that’s been swirling, then he and Tiny sit down and talk about how they survived in regards to their marriage.”

The father of seven has been radio silent on social media in the days since his viral interview on the Ladies Like Us podcast. During the podcast, which is co-hosted by Miguel’s wife Nazanin Mandi, Tip casually explained how he takes his 18-year-old daughter, Deyjah Harris, to the gynecologist to check her hymen.

The aftermath of the graphic and disturbing admission led to Mani and her co-host, Nadia Moham, issuing an apology. “The comments that were made and the reaction that followed are not in any way a reflection of our personal views on the topic,” the duo stated. “We support and love women and feel that their bodies are theirs to do as they wish. There was absolutely no ill intent toward any party involved & feel deeply awful about the entire incident.”

Deyjah has since deactivated her Instagram and Twitter accounts.

T.I.’s Red Table Talk episode airs next Monday (Nov. 25).

Continue Reading
Ryan Theriot

Ari Lennox Voices Frustrations Over Soul Train Awards Snub

Ari Lennox might officially be quitting music after getting snubbed at this year’s Soul Train Awards.  The “BMO” singer, who earned three nominations and was a presenter during the award show held in Las Vegas last weekend, shared her disappointment in a series of tweets on Tuesday (Nov. 19).

“No one will have to worry about me complaining after this current complaint,” Lennox began before adding, “Lol what I will not do is ever be this depressed again.”

Lennox continued, “It’s not just an award. It wasn’t any award show. It was the soul train awards. As you can see I’m [a] big fan of soul music and a huge fan of soul train history.”

The Washington D.C. native was nominated in the Best R&B Soul Female Artist, Best Collaboration and Album/Mixtape of the Year categories. H.E.R took home the award for Best Female Artist, Chris Brown scooped up the Best Collaboration category and Lizzo’s Cuz I Love You grabbed Album/Mixtape of the Year.

“Being snubbed was something I always expected and was definitely prepared for just not by them,” Lennox wrote while making it clear that her frustrations weren't aimed at fellow nominees. “My intent was to never shade other nominees. I’m hurt and don’t expect soulless haters to understand that.”

“[Every time] I wrap my mind around it I just can’t accept it,” she continued. “It feels like a break up. I made a soulful album. I never ran from who I am. I just expected the one platform to understand that. It takes a lot of energy to do these things and ultimately this was a hard loss for me.”

Lennox also pointed out that she's been grinding in the music for a decade and hit back at those who misconstrued her candor for being ungrateful. “Me being honest doesn’t make me less gracious or less star worthy.”

In another series of tweet, Lennox pondered leaving music to join the army. “I’m not selling out. So I quit. It’s clear I’m not ‘cool’ enough. Not trendy enough and I don’t care to be. I don’t strive for that. I’m not going to chase this sh*t ever again. No more fake sh*t on my part.”

Despite the critical acclaim of Shea Butter Baby, Lennox has been open about the struggles of the music industry. “It’s not just the awards,” she tweeted. “[Shea Butter Baby] was slept on in so many ways. I’m too emotional to pretend like I can play this game.”

Read her tweets below.

You know what I realized? People who genuinely fuck with me understand my frustration. People who are self hating haters and clearly have never given my music a chance got the biggest problem with me always.

— Ari Lennox (@AriLennox) November 19, 2019

No one will have to worry about me complaining after this current complaint. Lol what I will not do is ever be this depressed again

— Ari Lennox (@AriLennox) November 19, 2019

It’s not just an award. It wasn’t any award show. It was the soul train awards. As you can see I’m big fan of soul music and huge fan of soul trains history.

— Ari Lennox (@AriLennox) November 19, 2019

Being snubbed was something I always expected and was definitely prepared for just not by them.

— Ari Lennox (@AriLennox) November 19, 2019

My intent was to never shade other nominees. I’m hurt and I don’t expect soulless haters to understand that

— Ari Lennox (@AriLennox) November 19, 2019

Everytime I wrap my mind around it I just can’t accept it. It feels like a break up. I made a soulful album. I never ran from who I am. I just expected that one platform to understand that.

— Ari Lennox (@AriLennox) November 19, 2019

Me being honest doesn’t make me less gracious or less star worthy.

— Ari Lennox (@AriLennox) November 19, 2019

I’m not selling out. So I quit.

— Ari Lennox (@AriLennox) November 19, 2019

It’s clear I’m not “cool” enough. Not trendy enough and I don’t care to be. I don’t strive for that. I’m not going to chase this shit ever again. No more fake shit on my part.

— Ari Lennox (@AriLennox) November 19, 2019

It’s not just the awards. SBB was slept on in so many ways. Im too emotional to pretend like I can play this game.

— Ari Lennox (@AriLennox) November 19, 2019

Continue Reading
Yana Paskova/Getty Images

White Teen Girl Arrested For Plotting Mass Shooting At Black Church

Police in Georgia have put a stop to what could've been another tragic mass shooting at a predominantly black church.

The Atlanta-Journal Constitution reports a 16-year-old girl was charged with criminal attempt to commit murder after her plan to attack the Bethel African Methodist Episcopal Church was revealed. Gainsville Police shared in a news released how they teamed up with Gainesville City School officials to prevent the tragedy.

Gainesville High school resource officers were notified on Friday (Nov. 15) about the white minor's plans by school administrators. Students claimed the teen wrote a plan in her notebook to attack members of  Bethel AME Church based on the color of their skin.

“Our investigation indicated the church was targeted by the juvenile based on the racial demographics of the church members,” police Chief Jay Parrish said Tuesday (Nov. 19). “The church was immediately notified of the incident by Gainesville police to ensure the safety of our community and the current threat was under control.”

The teenager is now at the Gainesville Regional Youth Detention Center.

“This is an active investigation and a prime example of how strong relationships between the student body, school administration and law enforcement can intercept a potentially horrific incident,” Parrish said.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

Please see recent news release.

A post shared by Gainesville Police Department (@gainesvillepd) on Nov 19, 2019 at 10:40am PST

Continue Reading

Top Stories