Tami Roman Chats Online Comments, Being More Mature, Future Projects


You even went in on people for making comments online!

Yeah. Me and comments⎯we not good friends. We can’t be in the same room together [laughs]. I tend to take stuff like that personally. There was an instance where a website, NecoleBitchie.com did an article on me saying I was the newest wife and so someone sent me the link. I typically don’t go to blogs and stuff like that but someone sent me the link and I’m reading the article and I get to the comments and people were going in on me and I was like, “Oh hell to the naw!” And I snapped and I just started responding to the comments and when I look back on it now, that is so beneath me because people are speaking out of context about a person they think they know and talking about something they think they understand and I really shouldn’t have given the comments the time of day but in my defense, when I did The Real World, we didn’t have social media. So when the episodes came out it wasn’t so in the forefront that I knew what people were thinking but with this, as soon as something comes out people are talking so that was new to me. That’s definitely one aspect of reality TV that’s new to me. I don’t handle that stuff well because I want people to know the real me and I felt like they were commenting on something they thought was the real me.

What would Tami today tell the Tami back then?

I guess I would say to not be influenced by your surroundings and I think about what happened with me in The Real World scenario. I was living with those people and not really understanding reality, not really understanding this genre and how they were gonna turn things and twist things to make things seem like what they really weren’t. I would definitely tell myself to be wiser my decisions in what I chose to do on the show.

Speaking of, you got an abortion on the show so what was your response to people’s criticism then?

I think basically people are looking at the version of Tami that the producers and the editors wanted them to see, not the version I was trying to introduce⎯particularly with the abortion situation. That was a long drawn out scenario in my life and they basically whittled it down to make it seem like I was just some girl who got pregnant and this is what I decided to do, let’s just get it over with already. When I decided to have the abortion on the show I wanted to have it portrayed as something of substance where young girls could see it and say “Wow, she did the wrong thing now she’s gonna make a decision that was hard and weighed heavy on my heart.” It’s not like I just said “I gonna go get me an abortion,” that’s not how it went. Having to make the decision, going to my pastor, going to my mother⎯all the things I had to go through then having the actual procedure and then after having the procedure, having complications from it to where I had to end up going back a second time⎯all of that stuff was not witnessed but that’s the stuff I wanted to be shown because I wanted to have somebody look at it and go, “You know what, let me use a condom or let me get some birth control because that’s not the road I want to take.” And so every time I was involved in something, I want it to be something of substance and something of value but in the reality world you never know how they’re gonna portray your story.

What happened to the singing group?

When I came off of The Real World we got signed and we actually did our album. We had a single on the Panther soundtrack. But as female groups often do, somebody got married, somebody got pregnant and so for the most part we kind of just fell apart and the project never happen.

You once worked as an AIDS care specialist, are you doing any more activist type work with regard to that?

Not particularly with AIDS but what I’m involved with now is a project called Project Girl, and what it’s a traveling troupe of young girls between the ages of 13 and 18 who do spoken word and poetry and they travel to schools and theaters and do performances with their own poetry that they’ve written about issues that young girls are facing today. I stand behind that because my oldest daughter is a little introverted⎯not to the point where she’s a hermit and doesn’t socialize but she’s a little shy. But when she got involved with this particular organization she started blossoming into social butterfly. She’s always speaking her mind, always speaking about young girls issues and standing up for herself. That’s the same young girls who may not have been able to look at her father in the eye and tell him how she felt who was able to do that. And not just tell him how she felt but be a role model for other young girls. So she’s involved with them now. They’re actually getting ready to perform for the United Nations Women’s Council in February so they’re doing some really great things and changing young girls lives across the country.

What other projects are you working on?

Right now, I’m writing a book. It’s an autobiographical memoir and it’s basically giving you an in-depth look at my life because I think from my being on reality shows, people don’t really get a good sense of me. Like I said, you’re always going to get an edited version of a person so I want to let people know where I come from, who I am as a person and what my foundation is so when they see the edited version they know the truth and know that it was edited verses looking at the edited version and having a warped sense of perception about who I am. I’m developing reality TV show ideas, I’ve written and directed a short film that’s geared toward child prostitution and how that is so prevalent in our society today but it’s a hidden thing that people don’t like to talk about so I did a PSA short film on that and I’ll be submitting it to festivals and things of that nature just to bring awareness to the topic. I’m doing a lot of things and I want them all to be a reflection of who I really am as a person and not be the character of me or the 20 minute version of me that people see.