Child Crying Child Crying

Are You The Reason Your Children Will Have Issues?

There was a time when stability was the norm. Men courted women, married, moved in, had kids and stayed together until death do them part, literally. This was the standard order of things and anything but was seen as a scandalous taboo, however nowadays things are a bit more complex. Less people are getting married let alone staying married and as for waiting until after the wedding bells to live together and have kids, well let’s just say that more than a handful of us would’ve been the talk of the town. But could this attitude be the reason why many of our youth are heading down the wrong path? According to the National Marriage Project and the Institute for American Values, it is.

During a study they recently conducted results showed that children of cohabiting parents are more prone to "externalizing disorders, more aggression," as well as "internalizing disorders, more depression." The study also found that children who get to know all of mommy and daddy’s ‘friends,’ don’t have a firm sense of stability, and will likely end up shying away from marriage altogether when they grow up. In addition it was noted that "Cohabitation and out-of-wedlock childbearing is as much a symptom of the instability of children's lives as it is a cause of it." Hmmm, sound familiar? I’m sure many of us have lived this exact scenario. How many people do you know who were born out of wedlock? How many of those people are married now? How many of them are repeating the cycle and exposing their children to the same thing? Bet you know at least a handful.

For all the talk we do as a nation about how out of control our youth seem to be today, our actions do nothing to solve the issues. The number of co-habitating couples and out of wedlock children are on the rise and so are the number of children carrying out violent acts, dropping out of school and even committing suicide. Coincidence? Maybe. However, I agree with the study’s findings. We are the reason our children have issues. If children learn by example, then we are the poorest example in the bunch. Those of us who would rather live together to save money before we live together in marriage are the problem. Those of us who shrug off our out of wedlock kids because ‘Hey sh*t happens,’ are the problem. Those of us that think there is no problem are the problem. But as much as we are the cause of these ills in our children, we are also the cure. It may be time to go back to the way things used to be. It may be time to shift the focus away from one of self indulgence and convenience and towards traditional values. We need to set the example, the proper example. Perhaps the old ways aren’t so bad after all.

From the Web

More on Vibe

Tommaso Boddi/Getty Images)

Kelly Rowland Says Her Highly-Anticipated Project Is "Definitely Coming"

Six years ago, Kelly Rowland released her fourth studio album titled Talk a Good Game. The project boasted hit singles like "Kisses Down Low" and the transparent "Dirty Laundry." Now, the Houston native is preparing to release a project that'll surely satisfy fans' patient earbuds.

In an interview with Billboard, Rowland shared her hopes for putting out a new body of work and the pressure that she's encountered since she's been in the studio. "This is by far the longest, most pressure-filled process ever, only because I know what it's supposed to be and I have been so hard on myself. I know it," she said. "And it's the first time I've said it out loud. I've been extremely hard on myself. But it's definitely coming, and I'm more so excited about this project than anything else."

The news follows the recent release of Rowland's "Kelly" track, which was met with critical acclaim in November 2018. In addition to preparing the release of new music, the "Motivation" singer discussed fans' wish for a Destiny's Child reunion. The rumors have been fueled by social media photographs of Rowland with either Beyonce or Michelle or all three, especially during Beyonce's past Coachella performance. But Rowland assures readers that it's not what they think.

"It's so funny. I guess every time people see us together, they just see music but I see sisterhood, and that's what we are and that's what me, her, Michelle [Williams] and Solange and I are. People see us all together, they immediately think music. I'm like, no. Just family." As Rowland previously mentioned Solange, she hopes to one day work with her again.

"I'm a huge fan," she said. "I love her writing and how detailed and particular she is. I always wanted to figure out how the heck she has so many different layers of harmonies when she is constructing these vocals, and it's so complex but simple. It's genius. It's the genius in her genius mind that she has in there." One of the last times the pair collaborated was on Rowland's "Simply Deep" track off her debut solo album of the same name. Solange also penned a few songs off the same project. Fast forward to 2016, and Rowland's vocals were featured on Solange's iconic A Seat at the Table.

Continue Reading
Gabe Ginsberg/Getty Images

Teyana Taylor To Pay Homage To Ballroom Culture In "WTP" Video

Teyana Taylor aims to keep her hot streak of innovative videos coming thanks to this recent announcement. Taking to Instagram on Wednesday (Jan. 9), the "Gonna Love Me" singer will show adoration to ballroom culture in the visual for "WTP."

Directed by Gregory "Beef" Jones, The Aunties Inc., and Taylor herself, the Harlemite takes viewers on her journey to the expression-filled space where she hopes to rack up 10s across the board from a group of judges. The premise of the video also seems to follow a mockumentary format airing on a fictional network named FEMTV. Alongside Taylor, other men and women get ready to display their talents and confidence on the ballroom floor.

"WTP" is featured on the mother-of-one's sophomore album, K.T.S.E., which was released in June 2018. While the rollout's controversy didn't entirely muddle the excitement behind the project's debut, Taylor said she was sold on the idea that her album would be treated as the biggest out of G.O.O.D. Music's string of releases last year.

"I didn't know ahead of time that there wouldn't be any singles or visuals. But I knew that it was going to be the five-album thing," she said during a HOT 97 interview. "[Kanye] wanted [my album] to be last, he wanted mine to be the biggest. That's the way they sauced it up. I was sold."

The video will debut on Jan. 19. Check out the teaser below.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

👀 1.19.19 👀 #WTP Directed by @teyanataylor & @ogbeefjones @theauntiesinc 🙏🏾🙌🏾🙏🏾 The wait is ALMOST over. 😏 @museumofsex

A post shared by Jimmy Neutch- Shumpert (@teyanataylor) on Jan 8, 2019 at 6:32pm PST

Continue Reading
Getty Images

Trina Braxton’s Ex-Husband, Gabe Solis, Dies After Battle With Cancer

Gabe Solis, the ex-husband of Trina Braxton, lost his battle with cancer, Thursday (Dec. 20),  TMZ reports. He was 43.

Solis passed away at his home in Texas, surrounded by friends and family, according to the outlet. No official details have been released about his passing.

Solis had reportedly been keeping his cancer battle private. His death came as a shock to his loved ones. On Friday (Dec. 21), Braxton seemingly mourned the loss of her ex-husband with a cryptic Instagram meme reading, “I need a hug..E bottle of wine.”

The former couple tied the knot in 2003, and appeared together on previous seasons of WEtv’s Braxton Family Values. Despite finalizing their divorce in 2015, Braxton and Solis confronted lingering issues from their marriage during an episode of Iyanla: Fix My Life, earlier in the year.

Braxton has since moved on to a new relationship, but remained friends with Solis.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Trina Braxton (@trinabraxton1) on Dec 21, 2018 at 9:49am PST

READ MORE: Phaedra Parks To Join 'Braxton Family Values' Cast

Continue Reading

Top Stories