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Vivica Taught Me: Beware of Falling in Love with a Six Pack and a Smile

When Vivica A. Fox recently summed up her break up with her younger boo Slimm by saying, “I fell in love with a six pack and a smile and look what that’s gotten me,” I literally said, “Girl, I hear you.” Lord knows I have succumbed to the wonders of orthodontics and a 200-crunches-per-night routine many times in the past, and the result of each situation has boiled down to the same lesson: looks aren’t everything when it comes to dating.

It’s true physical attraction is what typically peaks our initial interest, but the dangers of being mesmerized by good genetics are just as tangible as a pack of swoon worthy abs. I didn’t start out putting looks before character; it’s just after a few bad experiences I figured if a man was going to be trifling he might as well be nice on the eyes. Or sometimes the combination of a well-dressed man with impeccable pecs overshadowed the questionable past that I knew was more fact than fiction. Other times I didn’t know a particular guy wasn’t good for me from the start, but once I did it was hard to break away from the sexiness. The problem in all of these situations is that the charm of those good looks tends to fade over time while your list of unfulfilled expectations grows exponentially.

Lips don’t look as juicy when lies are coming out of them; pretty brown eyes aren’t so pretty when they’re wandering all over some other woman’s backside in front of you; and those ripped arms aren’t so appealing when you suspect another woman has been wrapped up in them. I used to practically drool over my ex’s smile—to the point that he would catch me trying to sneak in stares and ask what I was looking at. By the time all was said and done I couldn’t even stand looking at him, much less admire his dimples.

Putting looks first on your list of qualifications for a man only (potentially) works if you’re going to keep things totally casual. If you know you have a tendency to fall for any man you’re intimate with, it’s best to not even put yourself in that situation—or else you could wind up singling the same lonely tune as Vivica. This, unfortunately, is easier said than done, but when you think about all the important things you really want in a man like loyalty, honesty, faithfulness, dependability, integrity, an occupation, sense of purpose, etc.—all of those things trump smiles and abs big time.

Of course it’s completely possible to meet an amazingly gorgeous man who also has his stuff together, but it’s more typical to meet an OK-looking guy and write him off for his average looks before you get a chance to learn about his positive personality traits. Although men tend to get all the blame for being looks obsessed, women are pretty visual too. We just have to remember sometimes it’s better to look and lust rather than touch if we’re going to end up falling in love with someone whose looks are the only thing he has going for him.

Can you relate to Vivica’s dilemma of falling in love with a six pack and a smile? How did it work out for you in the end?

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SZA Calls For Peace While Receiving 'Rule Breaker' Award At Billboard Women In Music

SZA called for peace and understanding at Billboard's Women In Music event Thursday (Dec. 6).

During her speech for the Rule Breaker award, singer-songwriter recalled today's climate, asking her peers and those watching at home for a little bit of peace.

"I'm sorry for the state of the world honestly, for everybody in this room and I pray that all of us just get through it a little bit easier and just try not to lash out at each other," she said.

The recurring theme of unity among women was also heard on the carpet from artists like Tierra Whack. In addition to her message of love, the "Broken Clocks" singer also thanked her TDE family for rocking with her creative process.

"I'm just so thankful for everybody having patience with me, " she said. Shouting out the key members of her family in attendance, the TDE affiliate gave praise to her mother, father, and grandma. In this brief speech centered around the artist's growth Solána Imani Rowe, known more commonly as her stage name, Rowe everyone for their trust in her.

"I'm grateful for everybody taking the time to have the patience to watch someone grow, it is painful and sometimes exciting but mostly boring. And I am thankful for Top (Top Dawg Entertainment's Anthony Tiffith) for not dropping me from that label. For Peter, who I change my ideas every day and he be like okay I like this," she continued.

Thanking the likes of musical powerhouses like Alicia Keys and Whack, "The Weekend" singer offered her appreciation and condolences to Ariana Grande.

Watch SZA accept the Rule Breaker award above.

READ MORE: Anderson .Paak, Tierra Whack And More Praise Female Artists At 2018 Billboard Women In Music

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Beyoncé, Rihanna, And J. Lo Make Forbes’ Highest-Paid Women In Music List

As November comes to a close, many publications will be crafting their year-end lists for all things pop culture. Forbes released a ranking of the world's highest-paid women in music on Monday (Nov. 19), with Beyoncé, Jennifer Lopez, and Rihanna holding it down for women of color.

Beyoncé comes in at No. 3 on the list with an earning of $60 million as she made most of her money through her historical Coachella performance, the joint album with husband JAY-Z, Everything is Love, and the Carters' On The Run II Tour in support of its release.

Jennifer Lopez made No. 6 for earnings tallying of over $47 million thanks to her lucrative Las Vegas residency, endorsements, and shows including World of Dance where she serves as a judge.

Rihanna follows behind the "Love Don't Cost A Thing" diva at No. 7 with earnings of over $37.5 million. Although she hasn't toured since 2016—thanks to her cosmetics and lingerie lines, Fenty Beauty and Savage Lingerie—the Bajan pop star has been keeping herself busy.

Forbes' annual list (which factors in pretax earnings from June 1, 2017, through June 1, 2018) has placed Katy Perry at the top with over $83 million in profits due to her gig as an American Idol judge and her 80-date Witness: The Tour that brought in an estimated $1 million per night.

Scroll down to see Forbes' full list below.

Katy Perry ($83 million) Taylor Swift ($80 million) Beyoncé ($60 million) P!nk ($52 million) Lady Gaga ($50 million) Jennifer Lopez ($47 million) Rihanna ($37.5 million) Helene Fischer ($32 million) Celine Dion ($31 million) Britney Spears ($30 million)

 

READ MORE: Nas Makes Forbes’ List Of ‘Hip-Hop Cash Kings’ For The First Time

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Kelly Rowland Hops In Her Bag With New Single "Kelly"

Kelly Rowland has it all and isn't afraid to brag about it on her new single, "Kelly."

Released Thursday (Nov. 22), the singer goes the clubby, confident route while rightfully dropping her attributes like her relationship with God, smoldering looks (a.k.a the drip) among other things. With "Kelly" being the first single since her 2013's Talk a Good Game, the singer comes out swinging, reminding everyone of her power in the game.

The mother of one has promised that her new tunes will be edgier and most honest than her past work that included vulnerable tracks like "Dirty Laundry" and massive hits like "Motivation" and "Commander." Speaking with Vogue over the summer, Ms. Kelly disclosed a few details behind the album.

“It’s about love, loss, and gain and whether it’s professional or with family or whatever, it’s just honest," she said. "I had no choice but to be honest and authentic with this record: it’s about friendship and marriage.”

She also explained a drop in confidence caused her hiatus. “I was thinking about pulling back from recording, but I couldn’t help myself: I still wanted to record. I still felt like I was missing something. The third year just came and left so fast. The fourth year I said: ‘I have to get to work’ and now I’m ready to release some music! I felt like I wasted so much time, and it was my husband who actually called me out on it. He said: ‘Babe, as great as those records were, I think you were nervous, you got gun-shy’, and when he said that it was like boom, a gong went off.”

Glad to have you back, Ms. Kelly. Listen to the eponymous record up top.

READ MORE: Kelly Rowland Debuts Smoke x Mirrors Eyewear Collection At Barneys New York

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