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Silence Is Golden: Should You Tell Your Man Everything?

Truth is a cornerstone in any healthy relationship, but nobody said anything about keeping some sh*t to yourself. While communication, sharing secrets, and being vulnerable are important virtues in any long term romantic relationship, there are still some things that go better left unsaid. Last night I was having a conversation with my lover, whom I can wax poetic to on any number of subjects for hours upon hours. In fact there is very little I actually keep from him, but there are a few things ladies that we should save for ourselves, lest feelings get hurt or unnecessary judgments are formed about you. Here are 6 of those secrets that you should not spill to your man.

  • How Many Sex Partners You’ve Had - The saying goes that when a man tells you how many women he’s had sex with you should divide the number by two. When a woman tells you how many men she’s had sex with you should multiply the number by 2. This is not to say you should feign to be a saved and sanctified saint, when in fact you can make a ‘juke joint’Jezebel blush, but a simple omission may do your man’s ego and your unsullied image in his eyes good. Even the most liberal, non-judgmental, self-confident and secure of men cannot stand to think about their lady getting busy with another man. So to err on the side of caution, keep your numbers to yourself.
  • You Still Love Your Ex - Many of us ladies have that one ex in our closet that loved our dirty drawls, and doted on us to no end, but for whatever reason we did not appreciate his love and affections fully during the course of the relationship. Needless to say, you still have love in your heart for your old flame. It would be wise to keep this kernel of truth all to your damn self. As the late great love song crooner Luther Vandross sings “If you can’t be with the one you love, then love the one you’re with.
  • You Can’t Stand His Mama - Often times mother daughter-in-law/girlfriend relationships are tenuous, but you can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar. Most men are sensitive about their mothers, and she can do almost no wrong in their eyes. By being combative or otherwise insulting to the most important woman in his life is a surefire way to stir up trouble in your relationship. If his mother is overly intrusive, or a certified world class bitch, figure out a way to convey your qualms about her without being disrespectful. Usually some pillow talk, voicing your misgivings in a delicate manner, particularly after a good night/morning/afternoon of  steamy passionate sex can aid in resolving these issues. Whatever format you chose, tread lightly in this matter while still maintaining your ground
  • Size Matters - Unfortunately we don’t get all that we want in one man (neither can we be everything that a man desires in one package.) Call it God’s practical joke. Ever had a good man, I mean a really good man? He treats you like a queen, worships the ground you walk on, goes to church, God fearing, nice body, excellent provider good credit…yadda yadda yadda…but the size of his male member was lacking? Listen, there is no polite way to ever express to a man that his shortcomings is in the size of his penis. I actually have no advice on how to break this kind of news to your guy, except you better decide if this ‘little’ problem is something that you can contend with in the long run.
  • @sshole - It is inevitable that your relationship will reach the proverbial threshold of encountering some knock down drag out arguments. No matter how upset you get it is important to remember to fight fair. Men’s egos are fragile, and more than that there is a way to have an argument and make your point without being disrespectful and demeaning. When having a verbal battle with your man, keep the word ‘bitch’ ‘limp dick’’yo mama’ and other emasculating terminology out of the argument no matter how heated you may become.
  • Your friend is Fine - We all know that Hakeem’s best friend is a catch and damn fine to boot, but under no circumstances should you express this to your man. This can just make the situation awkward between yourself and your man, and your man and his friend and is totally avoidable and ultimately unnecessary. Admire from the sidelines and keep it moving. 

Are there any other things that you think are worth keeping from your man? Do tell….

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Melody Thornton Provides Power Vocals To Stirring Solo Single "Love Will Return"

There's a romantic and mysterious aura that seeps into Melody Thornton's solo single, "Love Will Return." From the big band production to Thornton's riveting vocals, it's almost shocking that a gem so bright was hiding in plain sight.

The recent release is the lead single for her forthcoming EP expected to be released next year. Formerly a member of the pop group The Pussycat Dolls, Thornton has shown off her singing chops over the years through the group's most popular tracks like "Buttons," "I Don't Need A Man" and her 2012 solo project, POYBL. With "Love Will Return," Thornton pays homage to inspirations like Eartha Kitt and her Arizona roots. Co-producing the track with Eric Zayne, the singer shared with VIBE how cinematic the creative process was.

“The entire evolution of the song was magic,” she explained. “There’s just something spiritual about it. It moves me in a way like no other song I’ve written before.” The track is a strong introduction to her vocal abilities that appeared to be gravely overlooked during her PCD days.

Last week, The Pussycat Dolls reunited without Thornton, leaving many wondering why. "What I want for myself and for my bandmates are for them is to really enjoy their lives," she told Chart Show TV in January when rumors began to surface of a possible reunion. "When I was in the group, I was a kid...I'm primarily a vocalist. Nicole had been signed twice so it only made sense for her to sing the majority of the leads. But then, I kept being asked to wait my turn and it never came– and we only released two albums. So it's this mistaken identity that I've kind of had to unravel. For me, there's really nothing to go back to."

The ladies are all on good terms with Thornton as Nicole Sherzinger and the rest of the ladies wished her well wishes on her solo endeavors. "It just didn't align [with] where she is in her life right now," Sherzinger said. "She's doing a lot and doing her own music and we totally respect and understand and support her."

Nonetheless, we're thrilled about Thornton's new journey.

Listen to "Love Will Return" below.


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Ashanti Douglas attends "It's a Wonderful Lifetime” first holiday party of the year at STK Los Angeles on October 22, 2019 in Los Angeles, California
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Ashanti Joins Omarion's Millennium Tour

Our prayers for a female presence on Omarion's Millenium Tour have been answered with one of the most talented singers in R&B.

On Thursday (Dec. 5), Omarion announced singer-songwriter Ashanti as a special guest for the upcoming tour. "So excited to announce that Ashanti will be joining The Millennium Tour lineup!" he said in an Instagram post. The singer announced the follow-up show last week to what was perceived as a B2K reunion tour featuring Mario, Lloyd, Pretty Ricky, Chingy, Bobby Valentino and the Ying Yang Twins earlier this year.

Hailed as The "Millenium Tour 2020," the new bill features Soulja Boy and Sammie, with the Ying Yang Twins, Pretty Ricky and Lloyd returning to the mix. The tour will also include Bow Wow, who has several jams (and an album) with Omarion like "Let Me Hold You" and "Girlfriend."

Before joining the tour, Ashanti was a special guest during Lloyd's performances of their 2004 hit, "Southside." With such a large and memorable discography, fans will be thrilled to hear some of the Grammy-winner's biggest hits like "Foolish," "Only U," and recent releases like "Say Less" featuring Ty Dolla $ign and "Pretty Little Thing" featuring Afro B.

This will more than likely be a another big financial boost to the tour. The inaugural Millennium Tour grossed $6.7 million from its first eight reports, according to Billboard and set a career-high for B2K. They also went on to earn $5 million from three additional dates at The Forum in Inglewood, Calif. (April 13-14), State Farm Arena in Atlanta (April 4-5), and Oracle Arena in Oakland, Calif. (April 12).


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A post shared by ⚡️Omarion ⚡️ (@omarion) on Dec 5, 2019 at 5:57am PST

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Comedian B.Simone attends day 1 of REVOLT Summit x AT&T Summit on September 12, 2019 in Atlanta, Georgia.
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Boss Goals: B. Simone Earns $100K In Two Months With Beauty Line

Renaissance woman B. Simone is wrapping up her year in a big way. The comedienne, rapper and businesswoman scored a major win after raking up $100K in sales of her beauty line.

B. Simone Beauty was announced over the summer but has been in the making for over a year. Vegan and cruelty-free, her line supplies colorful lip liners, bold lipsticks, makeup bags and accessories. Simone officially launched a site for her products just two months ago with a plan to make $100K. The goal was met ironically on the last day of November, leaving her speechless.

B. Simone shared the moment in an emotional Instagram post Monday (Dec. 2). "This is bigger than me it has NOTHING to do with me," she captioned the video. "It has EVERYTHING to do with God and showing people Him by the way I act and spread LOVE. Even on every tube of lip gloss it says “FAITH OVER FEAR” on the back! I live by that ... God won’t let you down you just have to believe even when you can’t see the outcome. The sky is the limit when it comes to me I swear I’m a monster and I’ll never quit! Manifestation at its finest ... God favors me because he trusts me.

Simone also opened up about her doubts but continued to have faith in meeting her goal. "I had one more day to meet my goal and I started thinking, 'Maybe you aimed too high! Let’s just do a 100k$ goal for December.'  THAT WAS THE ENEMY y’all !!! When I woke up this is what happened... I do none of this alone I keep God-fearing people around me who love me, believe in me and see my vision. Thank you to my manager, my team, all of you and God. None of this is about money it’s all about walking in your purpose and changing the world around you to a more comfortable better place."


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A post shared by B. SIMONE (@thebsimone2) on Nov 30, 2019 at 10:49am PST

B. Simone has experienced plenty of other wins with her other talents. As XONecole reports, she hosted Will Smith's birthday party, produced and starred in her own hilarious dating show, provided comedic relief on the VH1 series Girls Cruise with Mya, Lil Kim and Chilli, as well as sharing tips on monetizing in the social media space at the Revolt Summit.

Boss goals indeed. Check out B. Simone's stunning beauty line here.

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