Vixenvman Vixenvman

Valentine’s Day: From A Man’s Eye

What better way to know how a man really feels about Valentine’s Day than to ask a man? A man’s perspective on this holiday is very interesting. Let’s see what their take on the day is.


When Mateo actually has time to remember that it’s Valentine’s Day, he actually goes out off his way to make whichever woman in his life feel special. If you want to be his special woman, don’t expect the typical gift giving or dinner date. Mateo is past that, and he’s more into the grown and sexy aspects of V-Day. With a new single, “Say It's So,” getting a lot of air play, Mateo took the time out to let us Vixens know just what Valentine’s Day means to him.

What do you think about Valentine’s Day?
Valentine’s Day should be a day you get to show your appreciation. You should dress differently and even eat differently. The day should be special.

Can you describe your best Valentine’s Day that you planned for a woman?
I’m from Ohio, so there are no beaches. Since I was in Los Angeles at the time, I wanted to do a bonfire under the stars. I took a lady I was dating at the time to Santa Monica Beach. I had a picnic basket and a blanket. We had a good time. It was something different.

What do you think about gift-giving on V-Day?
Stay away from gift giving. Gifts are whack.

Have you ever used your voice to impress a girl on Valentine’s Day? Like wrote her a song and sang it to her?
I used to do things like that when I was young. I would sing a song to impress her. Now that I’m older, I just want to be normal. I would rather just have a good time.

So do you have plans this year for the big day of love?
Being that I’m so busy, I pretty much have neglected my personal life, so I will be most likely traveling. But I have some options just in case.

Raheem Devaughn
Raheem Devaughn is known for his love making music (“Customer” and “Bedroom”), so you would think that Valentine’s Day would be a breeze. That is not the case. There is a lot that comes with being an R&B crooner, which includes pressure and great expectations. To fit the occasion, Raheem is dropping some jewels on the day of love, and he’s also giving a special treat which is a new EP; Destination Loveland that’s actually coming out tomorrow for V-Day. Two treats in one. Raheem is such a charmer.

Did you remember that Valentine’s Day is coming up?
How the hell can I forget? I’m Cupid Valentino. The Love Guru. Valentine’s Day is like my birthday.

Being that you’re a R&B singer, do you find it to be a pressured situation when it comes to Valentine’s Day because of the lyrics in your songs?
I feel pressured all year round. When you drop a video like “Single,” women expect you to be Dirty Dickler every night. I can’t be that every night. But seriously, when I’m dating or courting a lady, it’s definitely a whole other level of expectation.

What was the most memorable Valentine’s Day that you’ve planned for a lady?
Well, if you’re my lady and you’re in my world like that… I can be very giving and Valentine’s Day could just feel like a regular day because I’m always giving. But one of the dopest things I’ve done was write a song for a lady along with all the other perks that come with it.

Has a lady ever done something special for you for V-Day?
Hmm. Not that I can think of. For a birthday, yes. But for Valentine’s Day? No.

Men can never answer this. Ladies need to step it up.
One thing about being an entertainer is that people assume that you have it all already. So with that being said, the holidays can really suck. But it’s the little things that matter the most. Something creative.

So what could a woman do to make you feel special on Valentine’s Day?
Just be creative and spontaneous. Surprise me.

Do you think women need to step it up for Valentine’s Day?
Well, it is a bit one-sided. I think it should be mutual though.  But it’s not about one day. It should be about everyday.  It should be more about love and having that communication, so that when you get to Valentine’s Day it’s not so much pressure.

Q Parker
It’s no wonder why Q Parker fit in so well with R&B group 112. He’s so into being a romantic and pleasing women that singing about it is just second nature. Q is a solo artist now, but when he’s paired with an exceptional woman on Valentine’s Day, there’s no telling what might happen. It’s a bit amazing that with a new eye-catching calendar out and promoting his new song, “Show You How,” that Q has any time to please a woman at all, but Mr. Parker definitely pulls all the stops to make sure his lady knows how exceptional she is.

Are you a romantic person?
I am a romantic. I’m the guy who is just trying to capture the romantic moment and not just for Valentine’s Day. I try to have these days more than just for the day it’s designed for.

So what do you like to do for Valentine’s Day?
I like to see a woman pampered and especially at the extent of my hands. So what I did, I brought the spa to my house. I did the manicure. I did the pedicure. I did the massage. I did the bath with the rose pedals and then dinner. To some, they might say this is typical, but if you add that to a year of events like this, it will just add to special aspect of it.

You sound like you really like Valentine’s Day.
My dad worked all the time, and my brother went to the service. I grew up in a house with my mom and my two sisters, so I learned the simplicities and desires of a woman at an early age. I just really believe that a man should take care of his woman totally.

If there were no limitations finances or time and you were going to plan the perfect Valentine’s Day, what would that day entail?
There would be nobody around me and this woman. I would cook a sexy meal. Have some roses and oils. Just some real one-on-one time. No Twitter or Facebook. Just us.

What’s your idea of a sexy meal?
If I could, I would like to make a nice lean steak. Some sort of greenery because I’m a health guy, and I need to promote health. I have the steak for the proteins, and we have to get all the vegetables in.

No carbs?
Hold on. We can probably have a few carbs. Maybe a little rice or something, but it has to be sexy. The way I plate it has to be sexy. And then after the dessert comes dessert. [Laughs]

Derek Blanks
Derek Blanks may not look familiar, but his work as a photographer is known to the masses. He’s the man behind the “Alter Ego” photography project. Derek is responsible for to capturing the best shots of celebrities like Kelly Rowland, Usher, Jennifer Hudson and Beyoncé. It’s time to take him from behind the scenes and put him front and center. He’s been married for 10 years, so his perspective on Valentine’s Day is a knowledgeable one. Let’s see how he does in the spotlight of love.

Do you and your wife celebrate Valentine’s Day?
We do. I try to celebrate every holiday because of my work ethic. I work a lot, so what ever she wants to do that will make her feel special, I try to make sure I do that.

You’ve been married for 10 years. That’s a lot of Valentine’s Days.
Yes. It is. A lot of times I have to push myself to be creative. I try to keep it fresh.

So what’s Valentine’s Day like for you?
The most memorable would be when my wife and I first started dating, I kept note of a lot of things we did. So for Valentine’s Day, I did a soundtrack and I called it something like, “Our Love.” But the soundtrack was images of us together, but it was laid out like a CD. The packaging was photos of us from over the time we met. She loved it, and she still has it to this day.

I can’t lie. I made a CD of love songs for an ex-boyfriend, but I didn’t finesse it like you. I just put it in a bag of Hershey Kisses.
I realized that it’s more valuable when you put the initiative in it. Of course, handbags are nice, but when you make something by hand and put your all in it just to show the love, it goes a lot further.

Has your wife done anything special for you on Valentine’s Day because a lot of men can’t say that a woman has?
That’s why I love my wife. She’s independent, but she doesn’t make everything all about her. I remember I came home, and she had rose pedals everywhere. She had white chocolate covered strawberries and white chocolate is my favorite. She had dinner, and she even made this huge Rice Krispie treat that was shaped in a heart. It was really nice because even though it was for me, it was something that we both could enjoy.

What would be the perfect Valentine’s Day for you and your wife?
The perfect Valentine’s Day would be a day when I would turn off my phone and all of my electronics. We could to an island or a resort where can just exile ourselves from modern technologies and just concentrate on us. Make it day just about our relationship. I know she would love that, and I think that would be most appreciated than any gift I can give.

BONUS! Verse Simmonds dishes on what he thinks could be the perfect V-Day!

From the Web

More on Vibe

VIBE Vixen- Karissa Maggio

Best Of VIBE Vixen's Boss Talk Podcast: Saweetie, Amara La Negra And More On Making Boss Moves

VIBE Vixen's Boss Talk podcast amplifies the voices of women and she/her-identifying individuals in their respective industries as they discuss their journeys toward becoming the bosses we know today. From their demeanor and confidence and persevering through life’s pitfalls to make a name for themselves in their own way, being a boss is much more than 'just running sh*t.'

We rounded up some of our favorite pieces of advice from our first few episodes! Our bosses so far have ranged from rappers (Saweetie and Kash Doll), to authors (Karyn Parsons) to activists (Peppermint). Each of the bosses invited on the show have had some incredible journeys, and we thank them for giving us insight into how they've become the bosses they are today.

Whether they're thanking their mothers for inspiring them to be their best (like Amara La Negra), or chalking up some boss moves to being their authentic selves (Bevy Smith), this retrospective episode focuses on the awesome words these bosses have shared with us thus far.

Listen below to our "Best Of..." episode as well as all of the episodes of Boss Talk Podcast. Be on the lookout for new episodes coming soon.

Continue Reading
Photo by Chance Yeh/Getty Images for A+E

Andrea Kelly Says She's Been Attacked For Calling Out R. Kelly's Behavior

Andrea Kelly has found it hard to march for women as they continue to support her polarizing ex-husband, R. Kelly.

The former choreographer shared her sentiments on an upcoming episode of Growing Up Hip Hop: Atlanta shared on Entertainment Tonight. Speaking with close friend Debra Antney, Kelly tearfully expressed her frustrations with her ex-husband and praised Antey for sticking by her side.

The former couple was previously in a child support battle for their children Joann, 21, Jay, 19, and Robert, 17. During the time of filming, Kelly owed $161,000 in back child support to his ex. In May, it was reportedly paid off by a mysterious donor.

"When I think about the ways that I have been abused by Robert, from being hogtied, having both of my shoulders dislocated, to being slapped, pushed, having things thrown as me, the sexual abuse, the mental abuse, words can't even describe," she said.

In addition to the child support case, Kelly was charged with 11 felony counts of sexual assault. He's pleaded not guilty despite reported evidence of videotapes that reportedly show the entertainer engaging in sexual acts with minors. Andrea tells Antey how difficult the process has been for her since speaking out about Kelly's behavior in the Lifetime docu-series, Surviving R. Kelly. 

"Here I am, putting myself in a position because I want to help women, and they are attacking me," she said. "There's some things that I don't even speak anymore, that I feel like, once you give it to God, you better leave with God, because if I don't leave it with God, I'm definitely going to be somewhere with my hands on the glass, visiting my children every other Sunday."

Growing Up Hip Hop: Atlanta airs Thursdays at 9 p.m. ET/PT on WEtv.

Watch the clip here.

Continue Reading
Courtesy of Baby Tress

Baby Tress' Edge Styler Ensures Women Of Color Will Always Shake The Beauty Table

"Do you have edge control in here?"

It's an inquiry my niece asked me over the weekend as we got ready for our cousin's graduation. Atlanta's heat is friendly but mixed with nimbus clouds, frizz (and thunderstorms) are on the horizon. Given the circumstances, a high bun seems to be the best choice for me and my niece, a slick-back style with extra attention to our baby hairs. It's typical for either one of us to grab a toothbrush to slick and swoop our edges with pomade or gel, but with The Baby Tress Edge Styler, the process is easier and equally as stylish.

Created by boutique communications agency Mama Tress, the styler is everything baby hair dreams are made of. It's also a testament to the rise of the "style" in popular hair culture. With a dual comb and brush top, its pointed tip elevates a consumer to baby hair connoisseur.

But the styler isn't something created to appropriate black culture or piggyback on what boosts the most likes on social media. The handy styler was created by Mama Tress CEO Hannah Choi and her team consisting of other women of color like public relations coordinator Mariamu "Mimi" Sillah. The New York native tells VIBE Vixen the styler was made as a gift for an event they hosted but its intentions to propel black hair were always present.

"We try to make it clear that this is for women of color. Because we all understand the history of baby hair, we all have connections, we all have stories, we all do it differently, some people swoop it; if you see some of my coworkers they do the swirls," she said. "This is a product that we want everyone to see and think, 'I don't need to be using a toothbrush. I deserve more than a toothbrush.' This is a tool made thoughtfully with women of color in mind and we are women of color who came up with the idea because we know what we need."

Coming in six different colors, the styler's bristles are stronger than a typical toothbrush and give anyone's edges a look all their own. Over the years, styled baby hairs have gotten the white-washed celeb treatment. From the runways of New York Fashion Week to fans of black culture like Kim Kardashian, its recent love affair among popular culture crosses out its rich roots.

Many have attributed the actual rise of baby hairs to the '70s with pioneers like LaToya Jackson and Sylvia Robinson of CEO Sugar Hill Records sporting their luxurious edges with Rozonda "Chilli" Thomas being the all-time queen. Recent entertainers like Ella Mai and FKA twigs have made them fun and creative. There are also the many Latinx and black around the way queens who have kept the culture alive.


View this post on Instagram


A post shared by Ebony Brown (@wildcatebonybrown) on Jun 3, 2019 at 1:31pm PDT

“Our tool is more than a beauty product, it’s a conversation starter," Choi, who is of Korean descent, previously told fashion site Beauty Independent. "There are nuances of someone’s world that you won’t see if you’re not part of that community. And we felt that the conversation around why this market is so underserved should be brought to light and talked about. We are seeing such a big change now in fashion and beauty in terms of representation, and we want to be able to have that conversation without it being heavy. We want it to be approachable. Our brand is very approachable.”

When it comes to moving in the black hair space, Sillah feels empowered at Mama Tress. It also makes it easy to develop black hair tools like the styler. "I feel like my voice is listened to because I am a consumer of all these things. It's empowering to be in a position to have more control," she said. "If we're being honest, a lot of the black hair spaces are not owned by people who look like us. To be in a position where I can say "No, don't create this product, we don't wear things like this,' or 'Actually you should name it this because this resonates with this community,' I'm an advocate for my community. That's part of the reason why Baby Tress was created because it's about a larger conversation, about things not being thoughtfully made for us."

Baby Tress' next steps are to make the styler accessible to consumers and create even more products dedicated to black women.

“We need to be in retail spaces because this is a product you need to see up close and touch it and play with it,” said Shannon Kennard, account executive at Mama Tress tells Glossy. “Everyone who tries it falls in love with it.”

Sillah is more than ready for women of color to elevate their beauty regimen, one creation at a time. The future of Baby Tress includes an array of more products designed with women of color in mind.

"Anything that has to do with baby hair, we can bring to Baby Tress and make it beautifully designed and effective," she said.  "That's what this is about. It's about that step up. Again, we should not be using a toothbrush anymore."

Learn more about Baby Tress here.


Continue Reading

Top Stories