Why Do (Most) Men Cheat?
Award-winning producer, singer and songwriter Verse Simmonds has made a pit stop here on VIBE Vixen. The "Boo Thang" crooner will be contributing a blog to our site every Monday for the month of February. Because this is what we can call The Love Month, the BuVision/Def Jam signee will touch on love, sex and relationships from a man's point of view, of course! He'll be dishing on what the ladies want to know, need to know and just desire a man's insight about. Get into it....
As far back as I can remember, this has been a question that people have been looking for an answer to, and as crazy as it may sound, to me the answer is very easy to see. Why do most men cheat?! Welp, the reason is because men aren't committed to the pussy! LOL, harsh I know, but let's keep it all the way real. We separate emotion from sex, and most men will substitute an emotional encounter with his significant other for a quickie with a bad bitch in an empty parking lot (please excuse the "man talk"). Another major factor in a man cheating is his options. DUH!
For, you ladies that love Mr. Popular or Mr. Bad Boy, think about everything that you like about him. (I'll wait! Katt Williams voice). Okay, that's exactly what every other woman likes about him as well! And let's be honest, women don't make cheating any harder. It's like women are battling each other but complaining about it at the same time. For some reason, once a man has a lady, he then becomes more attractive to other women SMH. He could have been trying his whole damn life to get with this one girl, but some females only see the value of having him once she knows that someone else has him. And the man, like the simple-minded creatures that we are, would most likely still try it out to see if it was worth the wait.
I spoke to one of my female friends, and she's like most women I've spoken to about this. She believes that this outlook is total bullshit and that men can control these urges for other women if they wanted to. What I have been trying to explain to her is that from the time that a man is born until he has found the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with, he is taught, told and trained to chase after women; this is what men do. The issue with this isn't that men shouldn't chase women because it is, of course, necessary for human existence. It's the fact that women think that once we find that woman our entire mind frame--from birth to the time we decide to commit to a relationship--is supposed to all of a sudden change. The idea of that doesn't even sound possible! But lets break it down a little more: While us men were being told not to settle down too early and to play the field as much as possible, the complete opposite was being told to women which is basically find a husband while you're young, get married and start a family. It's no wonder why men are afraid to commit LOL!
Men by nature are hunters like any other animal. We all have built-in triggers that we sometimes don't even realize that we have. Visualize this: a woman walks by a man looking good and smelling even better. What does he do? You guessed it! Nine out of 10 times that man will pretty much watch her walk on by until he cant see her in his sight anymore. Unless of course she's not as bad as he thought she would be (we call that the swindle haha). Now wide screen that same visual and add 10 men to the same scenarios, and nine out of that 10 will do the same thing. The one that does not is either right next to his girl trying figure out how to sneak a peak, or he's watching one of the guys looking at the woman walk by if you catch my drift. If you're wondering how that relates to animal-like behavior, well it's simple. Take a brand new tennis ball and throw it past a dog. See if that four-legged pooch we all love doesn't run as fast as his little legs can take him to catch it, even if it means risking getting run over by on-coming traffic. The point is that it's instinctive, and for the dog to not chase that ball, he must either be trained not to or he is too old and lazy to--MUCH LIKE MEN! It makes me wonder if these instincts were put into men purposely for the sake of procreation, seeing as though there are so many more women than men. If every man was to only be with one woman, how fruitful could we really be as a humans? (I actually read that somewhere and wondered if it was true).
Now in no way am I saying that cheating is the right thing to do cause hurting someone you're supposed to be protecting and loving isn't cool. Then again, most men don't factor in the fact that he may be hurting someone, because as men we think she will never find out and this is more proof of how simple we really are because SHE ALWAYS FINS OUT! I just wanted to give a better understanding to women so that you know what it is we are all up against when it comes to this matter. Instead of continuously asking "why," this may be able to help you figure out how to prevent it. Either way these are just my thoughts wrong or right, what are yours? Til next time... [email protected]VERSESIMMONDS