Why NOT Having a Valentine Matters
Since the days of St. Valentine (whom the holiday is named after), the requirement to have a valentine has dwindled, especially for women. At a time where Valentine’s Day is seen more as a commercialized holiday for candy and flower companies to profit from, the fourteenth of February is an excuse to distinguish the single from the sappy and not offer solace to the former. While some might opt to spend tonight reading romance novels and eating boxes of chocolates by themselves, there are actually great reasons why not having a valentine does matter. -Adelle Platon
Independent women never need anything, especially a valentine.
Valentine’s Day is a tiny calendar label that gets written over in an already-filled planner for today’s working women. Busy business beauties don’t evade the holiday, but they sure as hell won’t spend their day sulking. According to a March 2011 “Women at Work” report from the Bureau of Labor Statistics, numbers suggest that young women now earn 8% more than their male counterparts, which means ladies are starting to bring in more of the paycheck. If President Obama was too busy running the country on February 14th or planning a $3.8 trillion budget plan proposed the day before, there is little doubt Michelle Obama would spend her Valen-time waiting for Barack to come home rather than use the free time to hang out with Bo and her daughters or fight against child obesity.
Heartbroken women seem to be more successful.
At the Grammy Awards, Adele snatched up six golden record players for her hit “Rolling in the Deep” and 21 album, including Best Record of the Year and Best Album of the Year. Inspired by her money-seeking ex, the heartbreak compilation earned her adoration from artists and fans of nearly every genre. A blue-do’d Katy Perry, who is also known for giving a musical finger to her exes, performed her new single “Part Of Me” which was decked with insinuating blows to her ex-husband Russell Brand. Rihanna brought the supposed-Chris-Brown-inspired “We Found Love” to the Grammy audience (Breezy included), the lamenting lover’s anthem for both the clubgoers and Caribbean island natives that has killed radio rotations around the world. It’s safe to say that these women at their single prime were more concerned about their passions than their valentines.
Unless you’re a Kardashian, cementing romance within a day, weeks or even months won’t come as easily for the rest of us. Valentine’s Day shouldn’t be treated like Christmas where people scramble to find a last-minute stand-in just to have the audacity to say they weren’t alone on February 14th. If having a valentine doesn’t matter, settling for the right person to spend your time with should. With all the Hallmark hoopla that takes up unnecessary shelving in drug stores as soon as New Year’s is over, it’s easy to default to thoughts of loneliness. But once the calendar flips to the next day, the world is back to being exactly what it was without the pink and red adornments. Being colorblind to the capitalist interests of Valentine’s day will support there is no law that states every person should have a valentine or should feel horrible about not having one.
Since written cards and candy hearts in elementary school, I’ve grown a little tougher, pickier and a lot more critical of the title “valentine.” I have met less than a handful of gentlemen in my 22-year-young lifetime who have ever been worthy of being crowned as such. I’ve been treated to candlelit dinners in apartments-turned-restaurants, taken to see rom-com chick flicks, serenaded with guitar melodies and gifted tickets to see my favorite artist in concert, but the tangible gifts were more voluntary than necessary.
Valentine’s Day is open to many interpretations: a day-long fling, a milestone in a serious relationship or a traumatic memory of romance better left forgotten. Like the meaning of February 14th, women have evolved and grown into their own entity needing the men to assist or overshadow us. When it comes to a female’s status on love’s holiday, there are now more outside factors to take into account: busy careers, post-relationship success and simply, the inability to find the right one. Each just signifies a smarter, priority-driven woman who’ll know a viable Valentine when she sees one.