What Would Your Ex Say About You?


Sometimes the end of a relationship is the most profound part. After the tears, inappropriate texts, and maybe even a backslide (or three), a break-up can reveal the most about the individuals involved. The way we love, or don’t love, sheds light on the crevices of our character and may even lead to a complete transformation. When it’s all said and done, your ex has a slew of dirty laundry and deep dark secrets that perhaps no one has ever seen or known.

Even our beloved president is not exempt from this fact. Genevieve Cook, a woman who dated Barack Obama for over a year, will have excerpts of her journal entries regarding their relationship published in an upcoming book. David MaranissBarack Obama: The Story will take readers inside the intimate details about the President, according to outside sources. In the book, which will be released in June, Cook writes:

Thursday, May 23, 1985

Barack leaving my life—at least as far as being lovers goes. In the same way that the relationship was founded on calculated boundaries and carefully, rationally considered developments, it seems to be ending along coolly considered lines. I read back over the past year in my journals, and see and feel several themes in it all … how from the beginning what I have been most concerned with has been my sense of Barack’s withholding the kind of emotional involvement I was seeking. I guess I hoped time would change things and he’d let go and “fall in love” with me. Now, at this point, I’m left wondering if Barack’s reserve, etc. is not just the time in his life, but, after all, emotional scarring that will make it difficult for him to get involved even after he’s sorted his life through with age and experience. Hard to say, as obviously I was not the person that brought infatuation. (That lithe, bubbly, strong black lady is waiting somewhere!)

In a written portrayal of Obama that some would not have expected, Cook publicizes a side of our Commander-in-Chief that had previously been untouched. One can only wonder: “If my ex were given the opportunity to write about me, what would he say?” It is one of the many things that we only considered in retrospect. Without our realizing it, the things we say, do and feel are all being documented in our lover’s minds, painting an infinite picture of what we will represent long after the relationship.

So how do we, if at all possible, ensure that our exes have the best possible views of us left in their minds? One way around this may be to accept an age old sentiment of leaving the past in the past. In some ways, an ex’s perception will always be tainted. Few people will subscribe to the sentiments of someone’s ex without considering the influence of emotions. The truth is: what your ex says about you may not always be true. –Iyana Robertson

What do you think your ex would say about you? Do you care? Let us know @VibeVixen.