The Breakdown Of The Breakup The Breakdown Of The Breakup

The Breakdown Of The Breakup

Remember the days when you met someone, you liked them for a while, maybe even loved them, went out on dates, had passionate sex and enjoyed life?  Remember when they started to annoy you and you began avoiding their phone calls and eventually them at all costs?  When that happened, what did you do?  If you’re like most normal people you simply ended things.  Maybe there was some yelling, a tear or Angela Bassett style burning of left behind belongings, but for the most part you just let go and moved on.

Not any more.

Lately it seems like everywhere I turn people have forgotten the simple, timeless art of breaking up.  What was once a temporary inconvenience has turned into a life altering nightmare of epic and even tragic proportions.  Uttering the words ‘I think we should end this,’ can now get you sued or even killed.  I recently watched an old episode of Dr. Phil where one guest, Bonnie, had to deal with her soon-to-be ex husband writing and distributing vicious lies, in what her ex called The Bonnie Chronicles, to everyone she knows including her boss!  Another guest, Dawn allegedly unknowingly fell for a married man, broke it off when she found out he was indeed married, only to be sued later on by the man’s wife under North Carolina’s alienation of affection law, the same law that had singer Fantasia caught up.  In a more tragic case, Felicia Cruz, a mother of two, was murdered by her boyfriend of just five months, Miguel Pena, simply because she refused to move to Florida with him and was trying to break things off.  Two children are now without their mother because some jerk couldn’t take no for an answer.

When did breaking up with someone get this serious?!  I understand hurt feelings and not wanting to let go of someone you feel you love, but to resort to lawsuits and murder is past extreme.  Do you really need to sue because your man couldn’t keep his soul pole in his pants?  Do you really need to spread vicious lies and strip someone of their livelihood all to show how much you’re hurting?  Does the other person need to literally die?  When did breaking up breakdown?  When did it become unacceptable to just leave an unhappy relationship?  This society of instant gratification and entitlement has given certain people permission to feel as if the other person owes them something for wanting to leave.  It has told people that they don’t have to assume responsibility for their part in the demise, that they can simply pass the blame.  It has given people the false idea that hurt, loss and healing are not real parts of life so they don’t have to truly accept it; they don’t have to suck it up and move on.

Fortunately I’ve never had to live any of the experiences I’ve mentioned and I pray that I never will.  I prefer my breakups the old fashioned way.  However, for countless other women, and men, in the world this is a serious new reality.  The breakup has broken down, times have drastically changed and your very next breakup could very well end up being your last.

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SZA Calls For Peace While Receiving 'Rule Breaker' Award At Billboard Women In Music

SZA called for peace and understanding at Billboard's Women In Music event Thursday (Dec. 6).

During her speech for the Rule Breaker award, singer-songwriter recalled today's climate, asking her peers and those watching at home for a little bit of peace.

"I'm sorry for the state of the world honestly, for everybody in this room and I pray that all of us just get through it a little bit easier and just try not to lash out at each other," she said.

The recurring theme of unity among women was also heard on the carpet from artists like Tierra Whack. In addition to her message of love, the "Broken Clocks" singer also thanked her TDE family for rocking with her creative process.

"I'm just so thankful for everybody having patience with me, " she said. Shouting out the key members of her family in attendance, the TDE affiliate gave praise to her mother, father, and grandma. In this brief speech centered around the artist's growth Solána Imani Rowe, known more commonly as her stage name, Rowe everyone for their trust in her.

"I'm grateful for everybody taking the time to have the patience to watch someone grow, it is painful and sometimes exciting but mostly boring. And I am thankful for Top (Top Dawg Entertainment's Anthony Tiffith) for not dropping me from that label. For Peter, who I change my ideas every day and he be like okay I like this," she continued.

Thanking the likes of musical powerhouses like Alicia Keys and Whack, "The Weekend" singer offered her appreciation and condolences to Ariana Grande.

Watch SZA accept the Rule Breaker award above.

READ MORE: Anderson .Paak, Tierra Whack And More Praise Female Artists At 2018 Billboard Women In Music

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Beyoncé, Rihanna, And J. Lo Make Forbes’ Highest-Paid Women In Music List

As November comes to a close, many publications will be crafting their year-end lists for all things pop culture. Forbes released a ranking of the world's highest-paid women in music on Monday (Nov. 19), with Beyoncé, Jennifer Lopez, and Rihanna holding it down for women of color.

Beyoncé comes in at No. 3 on the list with an earning of $60 million as she made most of her money through her historical Coachella performance, the joint album with husband JAY-Z, Everything is Love, and the Carters' On The Run II Tour in support of its release.

Jennifer Lopez made No. 6 for earnings tallying of over $47 million thanks to her lucrative Las Vegas residency, endorsements, and shows including World of Dance where she serves as a judge.

Rihanna follows behind the "Love Don't Cost A Thing" diva at No. 7 with earnings of over $37.5 million. Although she hasn't toured since 2016—thanks to her cosmetics and lingerie lines, Fenty Beauty and Savage Lingerie—the Bajan pop star has been keeping herself busy.

Forbes' annual list (which factors in pretax earnings from June 1, 2017, through June 1, 2018) has placed Katy Perry at the top with over $83 million in profits due to her gig as an American Idol judge and her 80-date Witness: The Tour that brought in an estimated $1 million per night.

Scroll down to see Forbes' full list below.

Katy Perry ($83 million) Taylor Swift ($80 million) Beyoncé ($60 million) P!nk ($52 million) Lady Gaga ($50 million) Jennifer Lopez ($47 million) Rihanna ($37.5 million) Helene Fischer ($32 million) Celine Dion ($31 million) Britney Spears ($30 million)


READ MORE: Nas Makes Forbes’ List Of ‘Hip-Hop Cash Kings’ For The First Time

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Kelly Rowland Hops In Her Bag With New Single "Kelly"

Kelly Rowland has it all and isn't afraid to brag about it on her new single, "Kelly."

Released Thursday (Nov. 22), the singer goes the clubby, confident route while rightfully dropping her attributes like her relationship with God, smoldering looks (a.k.a the drip) among other things. With "Kelly" being the first single since her 2013's Talk a Good Game, the singer comes out swinging, reminding everyone of her power in the game.

The mother of one has promised that her new tunes will be edgier and most honest than her past work that included vulnerable tracks like "Dirty Laundry" and massive hits like "Motivation" and "Commander." Speaking with Vogue over the summer, Ms. Kelly disclosed a few details behind the album.

“It’s about love, loss, and gain and whether it’s professional or with family or whatever, it’s just honest," she said. "I had no choice but to be honest and authentic with this record: it’s about friendship and marriage.”

She also explained a drop in confidence caused her hiatus. “I was thinking about pulling back from recording, but I couldn’t help myself: I still wanted to record. I still felt like I was missing something. The third year just came and left so fast. The fourth year I said: ‘I have to get to work’ and now I’m ready to release some music! I felt like I wasted so much time, and it was my husband who actually called me out on it. He said: ‘Babe, as great as those records were, I think you were nervous, you got gun-shy’, and when he said that it was like boom, a gong went off.”

Glad to have you back, Ms. Kelly. Listen to the eponymous record up top.

READ MORE: Kelly Rowland Debuts Smoke x Mirrors Eyewear Collection At Barneys New York

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