Give It A Rest! How Text Messaging Strains Relationships
Text messaging can be a saving grace; a timesaver that lends the opportunity to literally think before you speak. For a Vixen on the go, it's a means to sanity as she is bombarded with questions and a growing to-do list throughout the day. In short, it's the primary medium through which all human beings communicate today, including in romantic relationships.
Preceded by the classic love letter and actual phone conversations, texting enables two lovers to communicate and maintain their bond. Although it seems like a great idea, the truth is text messaging will more than likely strain your relationship. While women tend to think with the verbal and detail-oriented left side of their brain, men think with the opposite: the spatial and intuitive right side. So when you say "let's talk" to your boyfriend, you shouldn't be surprised when he quietly sits as you lament about whatever problem you're having. Since there is minimal research on how texting affects romance, I can only draw from personal experience.
For me, the biggest con to texting is the dreaded one- (or two-) word response. As someone who enjoys sharing small victories throughout the day, it boils my blood when my excitement is met with a dull "Oh, that's cool" reaction. Really?! How one-sided does our "conversation" look when you don't seem happy for me, no matter how big or small the accomplishment? Clearly...
Emotions don't always translate via text messages.
A "hell no" or "LOL" could be taken as a sarcastic rebuttal, and those with a habit of over-thinking will walk on eggshells as they conjour up an appropriate response. When the response is wrong, you'll either hear nothing back or turn your exchange of information into an argument.
Another setback in the seemingly forward technology is the non-response. For those who are in a new relationship, the lag time between texts can be nerve-wracking. Is he ignoring you or is he just busy? Are you annoying him or is he just talking to someone else?
Finally, the most damaging aspect of a text is the information it carries. Although I don't think going through your man's phone is right, seeing words (or images) exchanged with another female is a dagger to the heart. Unfortunately, it's easier to cheat today more than ever before thanks in part to the text message.
At the end of the day, don't make texting the primary mode of communication in a relationship. Person-to-person and verbal communication are the keys to a relationship. It's the sound of someone's voice and touch of someone's hand on yours that builds trust. And if either of you aren't willing to put in the effort to communicate effectively, why are you in a relationship?
It's time to grow up, Vixens.