It Takes Courage to Love


By looking at the title you probably assume this article will be a combination of unrealistic concepts of love, blended with a dash of corny rhetoric, and sprinkled with generic phrases. Wrong!

Let me start by reiterating the main point: it takes courage to love. Think about it: any coward can “casually date” or “pull hoes” (that’s easy). It takes a special kind of person to let their guard down, overcome insecurities, and love someone we aren’t obligated to even care about. We see a man with multiple women,and the common consensus is he is a lucky guy to be so successful with women. However, if he was truly successful with women, he would have (successfully) found one to make his partner.

Perhaps his own uncertainties won’t let him. Maybe his heart was broken when he was younger and now his self-esteem is permanently bruised. I used to look at these kinds of men with admiration when I was younger. Now, I’m an adult and feel sorry for them. I feel sympathetic for them because they will never get the kind of love from dating several women that they’ll get from settling down with one. Although the example I’ve given is of a man, this topic is not gender specific and applies to women as well. Quality is always better than quantity.

Let us not be mistaken. “Settling down” doesn’t necessarily equal love. Love is about letting go of all your preconceived notions about relationships and giving someone a fresh start in your life. Love is about not carrying the baggage and hurt from past relationships into your new one. Love is not about being bootleg private investigator and validating your confidence in someone by constantly checking behind them. Love is not about being apprehensive in trust because someone violated you or took your love for granted in a past relationship. Love is about always having the best interests of your partner at heart and having faith they do the same. Only loving yourself and family–anybody can do that!

Grow up and love someone. Be an adult for once. –Nova Giovanni

Nova Giovanni is owner and head writer at and also the author of the underground classic “Ramen Noodle Soup for the Soul,” available at