Wifey Material : The Back-Handed Compliment

I believe our words have power. And when I mean power, I mean literally POWER.... I call it a manifestation of our ability to will our inner most dreams and desires into reality through our words.
Now I know most of you are probably thinking I watch way too many Harry Potter movies, but for us to pretend our words do not possess the potential to be both a gift and a curse is an exercise in irresponsibility. Here are a few examples of what I mean.

Quick question... What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the phrase "I need a man that's gonna hold me down"?
Some of you are probably thinking it means having a man in your corner that will be there for you when you need him,right? Sounds like an ideal situation...but let's explore this term further.
Call me crazy, but the very concept of someone holding me down would have me fighting tooth and nail to get their ass off of me. When I think of someone holding you down, they are in essence preventing you from reaching your potential so why on GOD's green earth would you want to be with someone like that? Trust me when I say if given the opportunity to "hold you down" some men will not hesitate to do so.
You may find yourself in a suffocating, and controlling predicament you weren't prepared for.

Another phrase that I know we all can do without is "Wifey Material". Now you may have thought you've just been paid the most ultimate of compliments but sadly, you've just been duped. What that man's really saying is although you have qualities or "materials" he really likes, there aren't enough of them there to make you his wife....stings a little doesn't it? Not to worry, because he's just provided you a glimpse into his mind, and all the reason you'll ever need to leave this fool alone. Its just not worth your time.

And lastly... I swear if I hear another woman say that her man is her "Better Half" I'm going to jump out of the nearest 1st story window I can find! Are you really suggesting that you need a man in order to make you feel whole? What is that saying about the person you were before you met him?
Listen, whomever you decide to be with will have his own laundry list of issues that will inevitably become YOUR issues and I guarantee you you'll have to deal with the entirety of those issues, not just half.

Many of you will dismiss what I'm telling you and write it off as being too literal. And you know what?... You're right! I am very literal about this topic. Many of you are finding yourselves trapped in the same cycle of unhappiness because you're not being literal enough. A man doesn't need a lot of catch phrases to tell you he loves you, or if he wants to marry you. I'm just saying...

From the Web

More on Vibe

Stefanie Keenan/Getty Images for Damon Dash Studios

Nick Cannon Apologizes To The Jewish Community For His “Hurtful And Divisive Words”

Nick Cannon issued an official apology over his controversial podcast that has since been deleted. The comedian and host shared another lengthy message on social media on Wednesday (July 15) apologizing to the Jewish community for his “hurtful and divisive words.”

“First and foremost I extend my deepest and most sincere apologies to my Jewish sisters and brothers for the hurtful and divisive words that came out of my mouth during my interview with Richard Griffin, reads a message on his Facebook page. “They reinforced the worst stereotypes of a proud and magnificent people and I feel ashamed of the uninformed and naïve place that these words came from. The video of this interview has since been removed.

“While the Jewish experience encompasses more than 5,000 years and there is so much I have yet to learn, I have had at least a minor history lesson over the past few days and to say that it is eye-opening would be a vast understatement,” the statement continues.

“I want to express my gratitude to the Rabbis, community leaders and institutions who reached out to me to help enlighten me, instead of chastising me. I want to assure my Jewish friends, new and old, that this is only the beginning of my education—I am committed to deeper connections, more profound learning and strengthening the bond between our two cultures today and every day going forward.”

Earlier in the day, Cannon posted a message stating that he’s “deeply disappointed” in ViacomCBS, and demanded that the company turn over the rights to Wild ’N Out. Now that he’s out at the network, Diddy offered to bright show to Revolt, although its unclear if that would be possible if Cannon doesn’t own the full rights.

Continue Reading
Tommaso Boddi/Getty Images

Megan Thee Stallion Says She Underwent Surgery After Suffering “Gun Shot Wounds”

Megan Thee Stallion is setting the record straight about a night out with Tory Lanez last Sunday (July 12) that ended with him being arrested on gun charges. The “Girls in the Hood” rapper posted a message on her Instagram account on Wednesday (July 15) revealing that she was suffered “gunshot wounds” and had to undergo surgery.

“The narrative that is being reported about Sunday’s morning events are inaccurate and I’d like to set the record straight,” wrote Meg. “On Sunday morning, I suffered gunshot wounds, as a result of a crime that was committed against me and done with the intention to physically harm me.”

Meg made it clear that she was “never arrested” and that police transported her to a local hospital where she underwent surgery to have the bullets removed. “I’m incredibly grateful to be alive and that I’m expected to make a full recovery, but it was important for me to clarify the details about this traumatic night.”

According to TMZ, a spokesperson for the LAPD said that officers had no idea that Megan was wounded. “At the time Megan Thee [Stallion] was with police she did not report that she was victim of any crime. And the LAPD has not received any additional information at this time.”

Police were responding to reports of multiple gunshots at a Hollywood Hills home where Meg was reportedly partying. Grainy footage from the incident appears to show her exiting a vehicle with her hands up. Lanez was apprehended on federal weapons possession charges and released on bond according to court records.

Megan has a visible trail of blood coming from her foot and LAPD had these niggas doing the CHA CHA SLIDE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET BEFORE HELPING HER. Police are useless! pic.twitter.com/1BCXAUW9m9

— Jalil (@dreadedgod) July 15, 2020


Read Meg's full statement below.


View this post on Instagram


I was never arrested. This whole experience was an eye opener and a blessing in disguise. I hate that it took this experience for me to learn how to protect my energy.

A post shared by Hot Girl Meg (@theestallion) on Jul 15, 2020 at 11:07am PDT

Continue Reading
David Livingston/Getty Images

Naya Rivera’s Cause Of Death Confirmed, Family Speaks Out

The Ventura County Medical Examiner’s Office completed an autopsy on Naya Rivera confirming her cause of death was an accidental drowning. “The autopsy findings are consistent with a drowning and the condition of the body is consistent with the time that she was submerged,” the coroner said on Tuesday (July 14).

There were no traumatic injuries or disease processes found during the autopsy and “no indication that drugs or alcohol played a role” in her tragic death. Rivera, 33, drowned after taking her 4-year-old son, Josey, out on a boat last week.

According to authorities, the doting mother and her son were out for a swim at Southern California's Lake Piru, when things turned fatal. In her final moments, Rivera mustered up the strength to boost her son back onto the boat but was ultimately unable to swim to safety. At least 9 people have drowned at Lake Piru since 1994.

Rivera's grieving family released a statement thanking authorities for recovering her remains, as well as the Glee star's fans, friends and colleagues for their support. “We are so grateful for the outpouring of love and prayers for Naya, Josey and our family over the past week,” the family said.  “While we grieve the loss of our beautiful legend, we are blessed to honor her everlasting legacy and magnetic spirit. Naya was an amazing talent, but was an even greater person, mother, daughter and sister.

“Thank you to the men and women of the Ventura, Tulare, and San Louis Obispo County Sheriff’s Departments for you commitment and unwavering effort to find Naya. We extend endless gratitude and ovation to the heroine who found her. Thank you to her fiends, colleagues, and fans for your continued support.

“Heaven gained our sassy angel. We kindly request that our privacy be respected during this very difficult time.”

Continue Reading

Top Stories