happy-woman happy-woman
Smiling Black woman

8 Things You Should Stop Expecting From Others

sleeping with ex 2

 

By rethinking your attitude and expectations towards others, you can start living a life filled with less stress. Here are a few things you should completely give up on expecting from other people.

----

1. Change

You know the old adage, "When people show you who they are, believe them." Well, a wise woman (Maya Angelou) understood that people are who they are. As much as we would like to hold the remote to someone's behavior button, that type of power doesn't quite exist. Stop expecting others to change for you and because of you. It's okay to be hopeful and many times, we are capable of adjusting - but people transform on their own timing and under their own conditions. Once you start accepting that some things are out of control, your problems and ultimately the way you view the world may also start to change for the better.

 

See Related article: The Ultimate Guide To Becoming A Happier You

kelly-rowland-celebrates-birthday-2

 

2. Birthday Plans

When friends go above and beyond for your birthday, consider that no more than just a really nice gesture. Nobody is obligated to cherish your special day, no matter how close the relationship is. Remember all of the times you were disappointed in your friends for not planning your birthday or even showing up? Even though you may dedicate such a day to be completely self-involved, life still happens around you and your bubble! Other people still have priorities that far exceed dedicating a day worshipping you. Relax with all of the high-mighty birthday demands and be grateful that you have a team of supporters who are willing to make even an hour or a phone call that's all about you.

 

Sad Couple

 

3. To Read Your Mind

Communicating your feelings and the ability to express ourselves is a big part in being a fully-functioning grown up. From the guy you date to your parents-- none of them are military trained mind readers. Half of life's complications will desist if you just say something!

 

pp2

 

4. To Compliment You

It's as simple as this; we crave attention. Or if you're one of those subtle types, you still enjoy a few nice compliments here and there. We gush when strangers tell us all about the best part of ourselves. Compliments are affable pick me uppers, but it's not other peoples' responsibility to assure you that you're amazing, beautiful and worthy. If you're not receiving as many compliments as you wish- run to the bathroom to do a face check.

black-friends

 

5. To Always Show Gratitude

When I was younger I was told, "The hardest thing in life is realizing that not everyone will react like you." To this day, that statement holds truth. We expect others to show appreciation or a form of gratitude in the same manner that we do.  Instead of hearing a constant "thank you" for our good deeds, we prefer the person acts on it in such methods as sending flowers or treating you to a thank you dinner. Hell, throw a thank you parade!

Bubble bust; not everybody thinks like you. Helping someone should not come equipped with any expectations of a reward, but an effort straight from your heart. It's a horrible feeling when your boss or close friends don't always acknowledge your good doings, but that's life folks. Every good deed doesn't get noticed.

 

Child Crying

 

6. To Sympathize

"Pat the baby that cries, but ignore the adult in need." Sadly, it's a lot harder to receive sympathy in your twenties. Cry if you must, but others don't always need to see.

Don't expect anyone to sympathize with whatever circumstances you face in life.

woman-reading-book

 

7. To Be On Time

Yea, it doesn't happen when you want it to. People are late, and there is no indirect way to speed them up. Instead, pick up a magazine and be entertained while you wait.

happy-woman

8. To Understand Or Believe In Your Dreams

What do people think about your dreams? Who believes in you? Unfortunately, these are daunting questions that we're constantly seeking answers to. Why do we care so much about how others view our paths? And how is it that we make room for their opinions and predictions? The solution: stop looking for answers. No one can see your dreams like you can and nobody has the power to predict your fall or your success.  If you're dedicated to the journey, drown out noise and any distractions.

 

 

From the Web

More on Vibe

SZA Calls For Peace While Receiving 'Rule Breaker' Award At Billboard Women In Music

SZA called for peace and understanding at Billboard's Women In Music event Thursday (Dec. 6).

During her speech for the Rule Breaker award, singer-songwriter recalled today's climate, asking her peers and those watching at home for a little bit of peace.

"I'm sorry for the state of the world honestly, for everybody in this room and I pray that all of us just get through it a little bit easier and just try not to lash out at each other," she said.

The recurring theme of unity among women was also heard on the carpet from artists like Tierra Whack. In addition to her message of love, the "Broken Clocks" singer also thanked her TDE family for rocking with her creative process.

"I'm just so thankful for everybody having patience with me, " she said. Shouting out the key members of her family in attendance, the TDE affiliate gave praise to her mother, father, and grandma. In this brief speech centered around the artist's growth Solána Imani Rowe, known more commonly as her stage name, Rowe everyone for their trust in her.

"I'm grateful for everybody taking the time to have the patience to watch someone grow, it is painful and sometimes exciting but mostly boring. And I am thankful for Top (Top Dawg Entertainment's Anthony Tiffith) for not dropping me from that label. For Peter, who I change my ideas every day and he be like okay I like this," she continued.

Thanking the likes of musical powerhouses like Alicia Keys and Whack, "The Weekend" singer offered her appreciation and condolences to Ariana Grande.

Watch SZA accept the Rule Breaker award above.

READ MORE: Anderson .Paak, Tierra Whack And More Praise Female Artists At 2018 Billboard Women In Music

Continue Reading

Beyoncé, Rihanna, And J. Lo Make Forbes’ Highest-Paid Women In Music List

As November comes to a close, many publications will be crafting their year-end lists for all things pop culture. Forbes released a ranking of the world's highest-paid women in music on Monday (Nov. 19), with Beyoncé, Jennifer Lopez, and Rihanna holding it down for women of color.

Beyoncé comes in at No. 3 on the list with an earning of $60 million as she made most of her money through her historical Coachella performance, the joint album with husband JAY-Z, Everything is Love, and the Carters' On The Run II Tour in support of its release.

Jennifer Lopez made No. 6 for earnings tallying of over $47 million thanks to her lucrative Las Vegas residency, endorsements, and shows including World of Dance where she serves as a judge.

Rihanna follows behind the "Love Don't Cost A Thing" diva at No. 7 with earnings of over $37.5 million. Although she hasn't toured since 2016—thanks to her cosmetics and lingerie lines, Fenty Beauty and Savage Lingerie—the Bajan pop star has been keeping herself busy.

Forbes' annual list (which factors in pretax earnings from June 1, 2017, through June 1, 2018) has placed Katy Perry at the top with over $83 million in profits due to her gig as an American Idol judge and her 80-date Witness: The Tour that brought in an estimated $1 million per night.

Scroll down to see Forbes' full list below.

Katy Perry ($83 million) Taylor Swift ($80 million) Beyoncé ($60 million) P!nk ($52 million) Lady Gaga ($50 million) Jennifer Lopez ($47 million) Rihanna ($37.5 million) Helene Fischer ($32 million) Celine Dion ($31 million) Britney Spears ($30 million)

 

READ MORE: Nas Makes Forbes’ List Of ‘Hip-Hop Cash Kings’ For The First Time

Continue Reading

Kelly Rowland Hops In Her Bag With New Single "Kelly"

Kelly Rowland has it all and isn't afraid to brag about it on her new single, "Kelly."

Released Thursday (Nov. 22), the singer goes the clubby, confident route while rightfully dropping her attributes like her relationship with God, smoldering looks (a.k.a the drip) among other things. With "Kelly" being the first single since her 2013's Talk a Good Game, the singer comes out swinging, reminding everyone of her power in the game.

The mother of one has promised that her new tunes will be edgier and most honest than her past work that included vulnerable tracks like "Dirty Laundry" and massive hits like "Motivation" and "Commander." Speaking with Vogue over the summer, Ms. Kelly disclosed a few details behind the album.

“It’s about love, loss, and gain and whether it’s professional or with family or whatever, it’s just honest," she said. "I had no choice but to be honest and authentic with this record: it’s about friendship and marriage.”

She also explained a drop in confidence caused her hiatus. “I was thinking about pulling back from recording, but I couldn’t help myself: I still wanted to record. I still felt like I was missing something. The third year just came and left so fast. The fourth year I said: ‘I have to get to work’ and now I’m ready to release some music! I felt like I wasted so much time, and it was my husband who actually called me out on it. He said: ‘Babe, as great as those records were, I think you were nervous, you got gun-shy’, and when he said that it was like boom, a gong went off.”

Glad to have you back, Ms. Kelly. Listen to the eponymous record up top.

READ MORE: Kelly Rowland Debuts Smoke x Mirrors Eyewear Collection At Barneys New York

Continue Reading

Top Stories