Vixen Valentine Chat: Author Tye Coe on her 'Ten ComMANdments'
Happy Valentine’s Day! Whether you’re single or boo’d up, Cupid’s holiday is not only the perfect day for love and affection; it’s also a time for self-reflection and a chance to really look at your relationships with the opposite sex. Are you in a relationship and not sure where to take it next? Wondering why the last one didn’t work out? Trying to figure out why you’re fabulous and still single? Tye Coe is here to help.
The New York-based relationship coach and creative writer has taken her years of experience and applied it to #men? The Ten ComMANdments, a go-to guide for women navigating love in today’s social media-driven landscape. This year, make it the last Valentine’s Day you spend feeling bad for yourself or tortured by a dysfunctional relationship.
Keep reading for Tye’s tips on how to move on, how to get put on and everything in between.
VIBE VIXEN: How do you know when it's time to leave a relationship?
Tye: Leaving a relationship is never easy, especially if you're in "love" or the "sex" is good. Women have a special gift from God, which is female intuition. If honored, female intuition will give answers on when it’s time to leave a relationship that is no longer serving you or even nudge you prior to getting into a bad relationship. The real question is when you "know," will you listen…or will you just ignore it?
What's the best way to get over a long term relationship once you've made the decision to walk away?
The long answer is in the book, but the short answer is: love yourself more. Take care of yourself and put yourself first. Remind yourself of the reasons you left and don't fantasize about “the good times.” Relationships always seem better than they really were once you've made a decision to break away. Don't trick yourself; no more stalking your ex's Facebook, Twitter or Instagram and break all contact. If you don't break all contact, you are setting yourself up for an on again/off again emotional rollercoaster ride.
What are the 3 top things women should look for in a partner?
1) Honesty- His words and actions always line up.
2) He has a firm plan and a vision for his future and he's working the plan (not just talking about it).
3) He is emotionally attractive, meaning he can open up and communicate with you freely without a lot of mental or emotional blocks that keep you from getting to know the real him.
What's the best way to take a relationship to the next level; specifically from boyfriend/girlfriend status to marriage?
Most women want to be able to eventually progress their relationship with a man they are very serious about. The key to this is in how you create value for yourself in his eyes. The man that you want to progress the relationship with must see you as extremely valuable, otherwise it will be impossible to progress to the next stage.
How should women use your book as a guide? Is it something women can refer back to from time to time?
This book was created as a purse or pocket relationship “bible” to reference whenever feeling weak, confused or torn on what to do with men and answers the top questions asked about love and relationships. The 10 ComMANdments set forth in the book are instant, go to reference points to keep women from experiencing heartbreak and misery within their relationships.
How is it different from other relationship books?
This book is extremely different; mainly because it gets to the root of what has been going wrong within generations X,Y,Z and Millennials, that root being feminine energy. It addresses the new hashtag world of dating and gives straight to the point, no nonsense answers.
Learn more about Tye and purchase The Ten ComMANdments here.