Do you meet the wrong people? Do you start relationships too soon then find them ending in a mess? Are you still waiting for your date to call you back? As we enter in a new year, you may feel the need to make a few changes in your life. You may even feel the need to just start over.
If creating a loving and long lasting relationship is one of your goals for the new year, follow these 20 things not to do in a new relationship after the jump.
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Don’t wait by the phone for your partner to call.
Remember your first priority is yourself. Make sure you continue doing your own thing. It’s not good to be always available.
Don’t introduce children into the relationship until you both have a mutual agreement on where you stand.
Don’t rush your partner into your child’s life. Children have a tendency to get attached to people quickly and forbid the relationship doesn’t work out they are breaking up with your child also.
Don’t put your private affairs on social media.
Everyone doesn’t need to know everything because everyone is then allowed to have an opinion on your relationship. Unhappy people are waiting for you to be unhappy as well, don’t give them the satisfaction.
Don’t expect your partner to be a mind reader. Communicate!
If there is something that you need in your relationship, articulate it clearly to your partner. Express your need calmly and remember that timing is everything.
Don’t ask too many of your single friends for advice.
Individuals who are single are usually doing different things than people in a relationship. Choose where you get your advice from wisely.
Don’t put down, always build up.
You don’t ever want to point out faults or criticize. What you want to do is build on all of your partners positive attributes and strengths.
Don’t let your partner leave clothes at your house.
Relationships should move in phases. Initially you are trying to get to know the person; you don’t want to have to move the person and then out.
Don’t ignore trouble.
When a person shows you who they are, believe them. If your partner shows any violent tendencies emotionally or physically don’t ignore it.
Don’t share bank accounts.
Sharing bank accounts is for when you are in a strategically monogamous relationship or married, other than that what’s yours is yours.
You don’t want your relationship to be built off of something that isn’t true. Lies are harder to keep up with anyway.
Don’t bring friends and family into minor arguments.
Brining friends and family into minor arguments gets tricky. While sometimes its good to get advice, you don’t want them harboring negative feelings towards your partner. If it’s a small argument, you should be able to discuss it with your partner anyway.
Don’t give up the cookie to quickly.
Enjoy your time together. Go out. Learn each others strengths and weaknesses. Once you sleep together there’s all these emotional connections you now have to deal with. Make sure it’s the right time.
Don’t compare your new relationship to your past relationships.
Everyone is different, meaning every relationship will be different. Your past relationships should be left there.
Don’t talk about the future US to soon.
Focus on the here and now. You don’t want to scare your partner off by discussing marriage when your only in the beginning stages.
Don’t pay for everything, allow yourself to receive.
In a relationship there should be giving and receiving.. If you give all the time, you’re not giving your partner the opportunity to give of themselves.
Don’t sleep over at each others house.
You’re in a new relationship. Don’t have your partner feeling too comfortable yet. A kiss goodnight and a wave home is perfectly fine in the beginning.
Don’t take your new partner to family gatherings.
Let family gatherings be just that; for family! Until you are in a serious relationship and your partner has met your parents then feel free to have them tag along.
Don’t over call or text.
Try to keep things light and friendly in the beginning. You don’t want to make it seem like your life is all about the relationship or that you’re needy.
Don’t lose your sense of self.
While a relationship requires two people learning to become one. You both are still individuals and should live life as such.
Don’t say “I Love You” prematurely.
Love is arguably the strongest emotion there is. When telling someone “I love you,” you want to make sure you mean it with everything that’s with-in you.