Michael Keith gives us the second installment in his “I’m Just Saying” blogger series. He discusses everything from everyday life, to relationships, to hip-hop, to whatever sparks his fancy, he shares his thoughts on the subject. For more on Michael Keith and the first post, click here.
How to get out of your own way when dealing with men?
Have you ever heard the phrase? “You are your own worst enemy”? Meaning it is you or more specifically your own actions that prohibit you from accomplishing whatever goals you set out to do. This is no more evident than when you are dealing with matters of the heart. It is here where we have a propensity to derail a relationship before it even starts. Truthfully, you will have to learn how to get out of your own damn way, and stop subconsciously sabotaging the relationship before it has an opportunity to blossom. Here’s a warning sign that you may be your own personal “Darth Hater.” If at any point you find yourself comparing the actions of your current lover to that of a past relationship, you are setting yourself up for disaster. Trust me, nothing peels a man’s crayon more than to hear about a dude from your past that has scarred you so badly that you can’t let it go and move on. You see, what this means to us is, you haven’t moved on from that relationship completely and we are the ones having to deal with the backlash of what this fool did to you, rather than having a clean slate with you. If this behavior continues you will impede your ability to trust your new beau.
Listen just because your last dude tried to play you by blasting the AC in his car, pretending to be driving somewhere to “handle some business” when you know good and damn well he’s chilling in the parking lot of a hotel waiting to get off the phone with you so he can go “handle that business” doesn’t mean that the same goes for the new guy. How utterly unfair is that? Ladies, if you take nothing else away from what I’m trying to convey then please take away this… If you ever find yourself asking “Why can’t I find Mr. Right?” Well it may be because Mr. Wrong is subconsciously hanging around ordering your steps. Never and I mean Never let anyone have that much power over you! I’m just saying…
Michael Keith is a featured contributor. You can follow him on Twitter at @Michaelkeith112. VIBE does not take any ownership of the material published or endorse any of the opinions expressed.