Hoodrat arts and crunk-isms are absolute heaven for me. Swinging dreads, multicolored lacefront wigs, Black & Mild smoke, red cups filled with Hennessy — these are magical happenings. Hip-Hop music obviously has a tremendous impact on our society and there’s nothing wrong with that. Personally, I love seeing my 40-something Jamaican mother hit the dougie dance when her direct deposit money comes in, so I’m pretty satisfied. However, the influence from some of these artists is affecting the vocabulary of our people, and some of this shit needs to go! Not only because most of it makes no sense, but also because the folks who use these sayings almost always sound like complete jackasses when they utter them. Shall we?
10) ROGER DAT
(Young Money: “Roger that! Fuck around and never get Roger back!”) – Unless you are in the military or playing G.I. Joe, this term does not need to come out of your face…ever. It didn’t sound cute when Tyga ‘nem said it, so how do you think you sound?
(Hot Boys: “Bling Bling, every time I come around yo’ city.”) – Really? Why are people still saying this?
(Gucci Mane: “So much ice, I should have brought my fur. Burr!”) – No, it’s not winter and Brandy has not unleashed her frigid vagina. This is just another pointless piece of slang referring to an ignorant abundance of hood jewelry. Please don’t feel the need to yell this in anyone’s face, especially if you buy your chains from the back of Hip-Hop magazines and The Flyer.
7) OH YOU FANCY, HUH?
(Drake: “Nails done, hair done, everything did”) – This one is not so bad if you’re being sarcastic. Unless you are confronting someone in the club wearing Chinese slippers or a Black Label shirt, I don’t see the point anymore.
(Nicki Minaj: “We the mean girls, y-yes we’re so fetch!”) – The Harajuku Barbie has a slew of odd sayings that her followers use during pop quizzes and 106 & Park, but this may be the most annoying. I love Nicki dearly, but stop trying to make fetch happen. It’s not going to happen!
5) BRUH BRUH
(Plies: “All my homies from the trap, bruh bruh!”) – Would you like to know what is worse than the term “bruh”? Plies giving it a twin, making them a song and having every goon yelling it at the most inopportune moments — that is far worse.
(Trey Songz: “It’s Mr. Steal Yo Girl! Lego!”) – To hell with those worthless construction toys we played with as children! Folks use “lego” in place of the boring ass “let’s go”. Illiteracy is the hot shit in the streets now! Yeen’ kno’?
3) WHAT THE LICK READ?
(Rick Ross: “Hello, good morning! Tell me what the lick read?”) – What the hell does that even mean?!
2) HARD IN THE PAINT
(Waka Flocka Flame: “I go hard in the motherfuckin paint, nigga!”) – I was told that this was a phrase affiliated with basketball, and it is now used as a way to flex on the haters with no particular point. I vote no.
1) I THINK I’M BIG MEECH, LARRY HOOVER…
(Rick Ross: “Whipping work, Hallelujah”) – If you don’t know who Big Meech and Larry Hoover are (most of you don’t), then you should probably keep their names out of your mouth. For those of you who do know of these men, only the Heavenly Father knows why you think of yourself as gangstas and killers (most of you aren’t), but God bless.
There you go. By no means am I trying to force anyone to speak a certain way, but it would be fantastic if people listened to some of the things they say. Life is not a BET award show sponsored by CitiTrends. We’ve got to do just a little bit better. I say this shit with love!