Big Ballers: 10 Rappers Who Should Buy A Sports Franchise
The Rapper: Gucci Mane
The Sports Franchise: The NFL's Atlanta Falcons
The Result: Young Jeezy puts on for his city—but does he have a diamond-encrusted Atlanta Falcons helmet? No. No, he does not. Therefore, Gucci the Great, who boasts about his love for his hometown team in several of his songs, gets first dibs on Matt Ryan's squad. With all the bank he's making (he's bragged about having a red-and-black Falcons Lambo) it should be no prob for Gooch to pick up a piece of a team that lost quite a bit of its street cred when Michael Vick left town.
The Rapper: Wiz Khalifa
The Sports Franchise: The MLB's Pittsburgh Pirates
The Result: Okay, so Wiz is probably a little too young to scoop up something so pricey right now (especially when he's reportedly spending $10K a month on weed). But, quite frankly, the Pirates stink and we can't imagine them asking for much more than a couple nickel bags and Wiz verse or two for the weak product they've got out on the field right now. Plus, Wiz already has the perfect theme song for the "Black & Yellow" ready to go.
The Rapper: Lil Wayne
The Sports Franchise: The NBA's New Orleans Hornets
The Result: Q: How can the Crescent City keep point guard Chris Paul happy and raise attendance overnight? A: Bring in the self-proclaimed Best Rapper Alive. Can't you imagine the halftime performances now? Only problem: Finding enough courtside seats for everyone in Young Money. Yeah, that could be a problem...
The Rapper: Ice Cube
The Sports Franchise: The NFL's Oakland Raiders
The Result: The Raiders haven't been the Raiders since they left L.A. I don't actually know that since I'm not from L.A., don't like the Raiders and wasn't old enough to watch the team back in the 1970s and 1980s when they were actually good. But I did see Cube's ESPN documentary Straight Outta LA earlier this year and it seems like the Raiders belong back in the City of Angels. Plus, anyone would make a better owner than the Raiders current owner Al Davis, right?
The Rapper: Snoop Dogg
The Sports Franchise: The NBA's Los Angeles Clippers
The Result: Lakers schmakers! The Clippers actually have a half-decent team this year. But no one's going to know that, because all anyone cares about in L.A. is Kobe Bryant and the Lakers. To combat that, current ownership should bring Snoop D-O-double-G into the mix. Is he a Lakers fan? Um, yes. But Snoop's been known to endorse almost anything for a buck (St. Ides? T-Mobile? Orbit Gum?) and we're sure he'd do the same for the Clippers. If only their stubborn owner would listen...
The Rapper: Drake
The Sports Franchise: The MLB's Toronto Blue Jays, the NHL's Toronto Maple Leafs and the NBA's Toronto Raptors
The Result: Let's be honest. Until Drizzy burst onto the scene you knew two things about Toronto: It's a city in Canada and no American athletes want to play there (what up, Vince Carter?!). Ahhh, but what if they got to rub elbows with Drake (and Rihanna...and Jay-Z...and Lil Wayne...and Nicki Minaj...and all of Drake's other close, personal friends) every night? Then they'd want to play there, right? Right. Where does Drake sign up?
The Rapper: Nicki Minaj
The Sports Franchise: The NBA's New York Knicks
The Result: We hope Nicki's hometown team (she is from Queens, for those who've forgotten!) doesn't mind when the Harajaku Barbie runs their unis through the wash with a pair of red socks. Pretty in pink, baby!
The Rapper: J. Cole
The Sports Franchise: The NBA's Charlotte Bobcats
The Result: Nelly owns a piece of the team. Michael Jordan owns a piece of the team. The team is actually pretty good....Yet, no one comes to watch the team play. Let's give J. Cole a try! Um, yeah, it's worth a shot, right?
The Rapper: Slim Thug
The Sports Franchise: The NBA's Houston Rockets
The Result: Now that the Rockets are limiting Yao Ming to 20 minutes per game this season, they'll need a big body to fill his place. Enter Slim Thugger: The Boss Hawg Outlaw! Okay, so Slim might not be able to hold his own in the paint. But he can tweet during every game and get us all really excited about what's going on on the court. Go H-Town!
The Rappers: Diddy, Jay-Z, and 50 Cent
The Sports Franchise: The NFL's New York Giants
The Result: Talk about making a power move! This almost makes a little too much sense. Who says New York hip-hop is dead? It's so big it owns its' own football team! POW!
Which rapper should buy a professional sports franchise next? Leave us a comment below and let us know!
